The rain fell forty days and forty nights, Flooding forests, meadows and dells; How hard it fell, dimming the daylight While I, at my window, experienced peculiar delights.
For forty days and forty nights, a water-logged world sang Hymns to the low, black clouds of cascading downpours, Tear-filled verses rang poignant pleadings.
Yet, without respite, the rains fell and all seemed hopelessly lost, As the deluge drowned out the chantings, poured forth its wrath. The voices rose higher and higher vexing the Source.
At last one cloudless morning the tambourining droplets ceased, Amok rivers, streams and brooks began to recede; All agog people rushed to celebrate the Event with a grand feast I, indolently, shut my shutters, rather indifferent to say the least.
Paul Mirabile is a retired professor of philology now living in France. He has published mostly academic works centred on philology, history, pedagogy and religion. He has also published stories of his travels throughout Asia, where he spent thirty years.
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PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL
Lya Badgley’s life reads like an exotic adventure book you can’t put down, but she writes plot-driven suspense about women overcoming life-changing odds, against a backdrop of global conflict. In this interview, she shares her views about creativity, courage, persistence and resilience.
You’ve had an interesting life – how often do people say that to you? How do you tell the story of your life in a short elevator pitch?
I’ve been very lucky to have had choices – many do not. That said, being born in Myanmar to Montana parents, was a good start. From Seattle’s arts scene to documenting war crimes in Cambodia and opening a restaurant in Yangon, my life experiences fuel my creativity. I’ve been a mother, a former city council member, and an environmental activist and now write novels drawing deeply from my lived experiences.
So, you were born in Yangon, Myanmar. How did your parents from the Rocky Mountains come to be in Burma? What are your first memories from there?
My parents discovered the wider world when my father was stationed in northern Japan during the Korean War. They fell in love with Asia, and he went on to dedicate his life to academia, earning a doctorate in political science. They first arrived in Burma (Myanmar) in the late 1950s. One of my earliest memories is coming home from kindergarten in up-country Burma and telling my mother that all the children spoke English in class. Astonished, she accompanied me to school the next day, only to find that the children were speaking Burmese. I had simply assumed it was English. To this day, I love languages.
What kind of environment did your parents create which encouraged your creativity?
My mother was a true artist, always encouraging me to find beauty in everything around me. My father sparked a deep curiosity about the world, especially about the lives of everyday people. Our dinner table conversations were always lively, full of challenges and excitement, fueling my imagination and intellect. I was never allowed to leave the table without sharing something interesting and eating all my vegetables.
In 1987 what changed your life? How does Multiple Sclerosis affect you today?
In 1987, I developed a persistent headache that wouldn’t go away. Within two weeks, I lost vision in one eye. The diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis came swiftly. I’ll never forget the mix of terror and wonder as I looked at the pointillistic MRI image of my brain, and the doctor casually said, “Yep, see those spots? That’s definitely MS,” as if he were ordering lunch. Strangely, that diagnosis liberated me—after all, what’s the worst that could happen? Now, as I age, the disease may slow my body, but it hasn’t dimmed my spark.
In what ways has being a musician/poet/writer/artist been a struggle and challenge? Do you think that is part of process and it in turn fosters innovation?
The struggles of being an artist—whether overcoming rejection, creative blocks, or balancing art with daily life—are definitely part of the journey. But there’s also magic in that process. There’s something almost alchemical about wrestling with a challenge and, through that tension, creating something entirely new. It’s in those moments of uncertainty that the most unexpected ideas emerge, as if they’re waiting for the right spark. The struggle doesn’t just foster creativity—it transforms it, turning obstacles into opportunities. And the joy comes from watching that magic unfold, as your vision takes on a life of its own.
When did you return to Southeast Asia, and how did you come to work as a videographer on a clandestine expedition interviewing Burmese insurgents, and later helping document the genocide cases in Cambodia?
The short answer is — a boyfriend! In the early ’90s, I returned to Southeast Asia, driven by a deep connection to the region and feeling uncertain about what to do next after a failed marriage. Through a friend I met during Burmese language studies, I stumbled upon an unexpected opportunity to work as a videographer on a covert mission, documenting interviews with Burmese insurgents. That intense experience then led to my role in Cambodia, where I worked with Cornell University’s Archival Project. There, I helped microfilm documents from the Tuol Sleng Museum of Genocide, preserving crucial evidence that would later hold war criminals accountable. Both experiences were life-changing and cemented my passion for telling these vital stories.
You were among the few foreigners to open businesses in Burma in the 1990s. What hurdles were there to opening the 50th Street Bar & Grill Restaurant in Yangon, Myanmar? How was Burma at that time?
Opening the 50th Street Bar & Grill in Yangon in the mid ’90s was a real adventure, and I take great pride in being part of the first foreign-owned project of its kind at that time. Myanmar was just emerging from decades of isolation, with very few foreigners and even fewer foreign businesses. Navigating the bureaucracy was incredibly challenging — layers of red tape, and we often had to rely on outdated laws from the British colonial era just to get things moving. It took persistence, creative problem-solving, and a lot of patience. I had the advantage of understanding the culture and speaking a bit of the language, and I never worked through a proxy. I handled even the most mundane tasks myself—like sitting for hours in a stifling hot bank, waiting to meet the manager, who was hiding in the bathroom to avoid me!
Basic infrastructure issues like inconsistent electricity and unreliable suppliers were ongoing challenges. But despite all the hurdles, Yangon had a special energy then. The people were incredibly warm and resilient, and there was a palpable sense that the country was on the cusp of major change, even though it remained under military rule. Looking back, I’m proud to have been part of something so groundbreaking during such a unique moment in Myanmar’s history. It’s heartbreaking to see the return of darker times.
When did you first start writing and what has kept you writing?
In the ’80s, I began writing song lyrics for my music, which eventually evolved into poetry. It turned out I had more to say, and my word count steadily grew from there. I write because I have no choice; it’s an essential part of who I am.
Your first novel, The Foreigner’s Confession, out in 2022, in the middle of the Covid-19 pandemic, weaves together one person’s story and a country’s painful history. How do you integrate in the legacy of the past, a personal journey, a war-torn country and the themes of loss and regret?
In The Foreigner’s Confession, I explore the interconnectedness of personal stories and a nation’s history. I like using conflict zones as backdrops for my protagonist’s inner turmoil. These settings highlight the psychological landscape shaped by war and trauma, reflecting the chaos within the character. I’m fascinated by the notion that evil exists in each of us, and under the right circumstances, we’re all capable of bad things. This theme resonates throughout the narrative, as the characters grapple with their moral choices amidst the turmoil surrounding them. As Tom Waits[1] beautifully puts it, “I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things” — that juxtaposition is central to my writing, illustrating how beauty and darkness can coexist and inform our understanding of the human experience.
When it comes to writing are you a planner or a pantser? What’s your process for writing, particularly when you want to bring in the setting, the history of a place, and authenticity?
I’m a pantser all the way! Just saying the word “spreadsheet” makes me break into a sweat. I wish I could create meticulous diagrams and beautiful whiteboards filled with colorful, fluttering sticky notes, but that just isn’t my style. For me, the story unfolds as I write. I refer to myself as a discovery writer. It’s a slow and sometimes tedious process but discovering what I didn’t know was going to happen is truly amazing. I draw from my personal experiences to provide authenticity.
Does writing suspense/mystery help make a novel more compelling because it has to be well-crafted and cleverly constructed?
I write the story buzzing in my brain and then try to determine the genre.
What do you think about the power and potential of a novel to reach readers in a different way, for example as a vehicle to give insight into the situation in Cambodia or Myanmar, the wider/deeper issues (like geopolitics/colonialism), and the present reflecting a troubled past?
Yes, yes, yes! Novels have the potential to foster empathy and understanding, challenging readers to confront uncomfortable truths. Can we humans please stop being so stupid? It’s doubtful, but we can only hope.
Last year your second novel, The Worth of a Ruby, was launched, and you’ve recently been in Myanmar. What’s been your impression of the place in 2024, still suffering under the coup and with not such good prospects as in the 2010s? Could you ever go back there to live?
Sitting in the Inya Lake Hotel in Yangon as I write this, I can see that the people here carry a veil over their eyes that I don’t recall from my previous visits. Nevertheless, the cyclical nature of oppression has persisted here for a long time. My husband and I would move back in a heartbeat if there were opportunities and adequate healthcare for my situation. This country remains a part of my identity, and I dream of a future where I can return to help contribute to its recovery.
Your current/recent visit to SE Asia has taken you to what places? What have been the most memorable experiences?
I’m in Yangon until mid-October and will then spend a few days in Singapore, slogging my books to the shops there. As always, the most memorable experiences are renewing the deep connections with the people I care about.
Both your books feature people/countries having to confront their past/dark side. How do you think a novel can help navigate through the complexities and nuances of situations, or at least show that nothing is as black and white as first thought?
That’s a complex question, and any answer can only touch the surface. Both of my novels explore people and countries grappling with their pasts and confronting their darker sides, but the truth is, no single story can fully capture the complexity of these situations. What a novel can do, however, is open a window into the nuances and shades of gray that exist beneath the surface. By diving into characters’ personal struggles and the layered histories of their countries, readers can begin to see that nothing is as black and white as it might seem. A novel helps illuminate the hidden motivations, moral ambiguities, and emotional complexities that are often overlooked, offering a more profound understanding of the tangled web of human experience.
Your work-in-progress novel is set in Bosnia. What themes will that explore?
The themes in my work-in-progress novel set in Bosnia will continue to explore the complexities of personal and national histories, much like my previous work. However, this time I’m weaving in elements of magic realism, drawing inspiration from the Sarajevo Haggadah and Balkan folktales. These mystical elements will add a new layer to the narrative, deepening the exploration of identity, memory, and the ways in which the past haunts the present. The use of folklore will allow me to delve into the region’s rich cultural traditions while keeping the focus on the enduring human themes of loss, resilience, and transformation.
Where is ‘home’ for you now? How do you think living in other countries has influenced your outlook and personality?
I am wildly curious, and home is the room I’m sitting in. Though we pay a mortgage on our condo in Snohomish, home has always been more about where I am in the moment than a fixed place. Living in different countries has profoundly shaped my outlook and personality. It’s given me a deep appreciation for diverse perspectives and a sense of adaptability. I’ve learned that people’s values and struggles can be both uniquely local and universally human. Experiencing different cultures has also sparked my curiosity and influenced the way I approach storytelling, allowing me to blend personal and global themes into my work.
What do you think are your points of difference/advantages that you bring to your writing?
One of the key differences I bring to my writing is my unique upbringing. Growing up in Myanmar with parents who encouraged both critical thinking and creativity gave me an early appreciation for the complexities of the world. I’ve lived in many countries and experienced firsthand the way cultures can both clash and blend, and that depth of perspective is something I try to infuse into my stories. Navigating a chronic disease like multiple sclerosis has also shaped my writing. It’s taught me resilience, patience, and how to find beauty in challenging situations. I think these experiences allow me to write characters and narratives that explore the shades of gray in life—the areas where pain, perseverance, and hope intersect.
Why do you think that a high proportion of expats/students/backpackers/digital nomads are from the Pacific Northwest and find themselves living and working in Southeast Asia? (I know three people from Snohomish who live in Asia).
It’s an interesting phenomenon, and I think the Pacific Northwest has some unique qualities that make it a breeding ground for wanderers. Growing up on the edge of the continent, facing west, there’s always been a sense of curiosity about what’s beyond the horizon. The region’s creative spirit—fueled by its music scene, constant rain, endless coffee, and a long history of innovation with computers and tech—fosters a mindset that’s open to exploration and new ideas. People from the PNW are used to thinking outside the box, and there’s a certain resilience that comes from enduring gray skies. This drive for adventure and discovery seems to naturally extend to places like Southeast Asia, where expats, students, backpackers, and digital nomads can experience a different pace of life while still tapping into their creative or entrepreneurial sides. Though, it blows my mind that you know three people from my little town of Snohomish living in Asia!
For aspiring writers and creatives, and for readers of Borderless, what’s your advice?
My advice for aspiring writers, creatives, and readers of Borderless is simple: always take the step, go through the door you don’t know. The unknown is where growth, creativity, and discovery happen. Don’t be afraid to embrace uncertainty and take risks in your work and life. Whether it’s starting a new project, exploring a different idea, or venturing into unfamiliar territory, those leaps often lead to the most rewarding experiences. Stay curious, keep pushing boundaries, and trust that the act of creating—no matter how daunting—will always teach you something new.
Keith Lyons (keithlyons.net) is an award-winning writer and creative writing mentor originally from New Zealand who has spent a quarter of his existence living and working in Asia including southwest China, Myanmar and Bali. His Venn diagram of happiness features the aroma of freshly-roasted coffee, the negative ions of the natural world including moving water, and connecting with others in meaningful ways. A Contributing Editor on Borderless journal’s Editorial Board, his work has appeared in Borderless since its early days, and his writing featured in the anthology Monalisa No Longer Smiles.
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PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL.
No one knew his name nor wished to know it. Only his face attracted those who came into contact with him. So it was said. A face whose huge, glowing eyes were turned both inwards and outwards, simultaneously. A face whose florid complexion, cheery and unfurrowed, bespoke a life of leisure, albeit not one of procrastination; a life of ease, but not sloth. In short, a life of early, unfought for independence.
I met my nameless stranger one fine autumn day in the Andalucian town of Granada, Spain, where he had been residing for several months, visiting the Alhambra Palace every day during those months. We had met in a small, non-distinct eatery, and he was very willing to converse with anyone who had leisure to tete a tete. We fell into lively conversation. Taken aback by his daily visits to the remarkable Palace, I enquired why he spent so many hours there.
“The Palace was built as a sign of religious, political and cultural power,” he began, munching energetically on his paella of rabbit. “But since 1492, that sign has been condemned to utter uselessness, reduced to a mere tourist attraction, however noteworthy. It has become completely useless since its mediaeval abandonment because it’s been drained of its original value.” Here he paused, I imagine, for me to intercede. I didn’t …
“You see, this is what attracts me most to the Alhambra; its utter uselessness for our world today. I do not consider mass tourism as an instrument of usefulness.” I kept silent to goad him on, for the turn of conversation piqued my curiosity. “The Alhambra epitomises all that I have spent my own life experiencing, consciously: the pleasures of uselessness.”
“Is uselessness a pleasure?” I nettled with a sunny smile.
“That depends upon whom it has been bestowed, sir. That depends for whom it has benefitted. The circumstances of my life and will to understand and decipher them, have conspired to draw me now into and outside of myself. My own self has become as useless as the objects that I set my eyes on each and every day as I saunter through the streets, gardens or palaces of wherever I happen to be. I have realised that such an absorption into social uselessness, and thus distance from social use, has constituted my raison d’être. And there lies the pleasure: this mode of existence is a project of life; a pure project of pleasurable uselessness to society and to myself.” His face, alit with integrity, bent low to attack the chorizos cooked in white wine sauce.
“When did you begin experimenting your project?” I asked, sipping my sangria.
“I would formulate it differently: When did uselessness experiment me!” he mumbled, his mouth full of chorizo. “It all began in Africa some thirty or forty years back, during my youthful days wandering through the Sahara desert en route to Timbucktoo. The Blue Men of the Sahara appeared absolutely useless to anyone or anything that we Europeans would call useful.”
“Such as?”
“Well, a roof over one’s head, a shower every hour, a steady, well-paid job, a car and such things … what we Europeans would term as useful, conditioned to adhere to the philosophy of infinite progress; to infinite social and political usefulness. All the Blue Men seemed to require were a few hours of sleep, food, water and the desire to procreate. Needs that all mankind need so as to account for our very presence on Earth. I lived in the desert for over a year, and little by little discovered that this lifestyle suited a possibility of existence, a life not of a desert-nomad mind you, but one of a useless idler, which as time went by, proved possible, be it in the cities of Europe and Asia or in their countryside towns and villages.”
“As I understand it, social success has no meaning for you at all?”
“Not at all. Success only invites humiliation or cruel jealousy, and the pursuit of wealth is a path marked by ruthlessness. I earn my living simply to eat, to dress according to the climate, to have a roof over my head when needed.”
“But a roof over one’s head could be expensive…” I intervened.
“I spend most of my nights out under the stars when the weather is warm. With the coming of winter, I seek refuge in Catholic missions, poor men’s shelters or in the numerous Salvation Army shelters. Any asylum that will not turn me down. As far as any permanent residence, I have taken up lodgings in the homes of generous people for a meagre fee, or have laboured on farms for my food and bed. Do not confuse uselessness with doing nothing. I’m no couch potato; I have done many things, but they do not fit into our social machine of imposed well-being. My life may appear negative to those who hold me in contempt, but my usefulness is as useful to mankind as it is to myself. Don’t forget what one Belgium writer once wrote: ‘It is thanks to a certain number of men who seem useless that there will always be a certain number of useful men.’”
“Who wrote that?”
“I forgot. But what difference does it make?” He wiped his mouth delicately, smacking his lips. He proceeded: “I imagine you probably believe me to be a social parasite or a social zero as Balzac once wrote, useless even as a human being. But read Friedrich Nietzsche on this point,” and he quoted: “’Thevalue of a human being does not lie in his usefulnes; for it would continue to exist even if there were nobody to whom he could be useful.’”
“Quite an imposing thought,” I acknowledged, sitting back. “But you must admit that you have been useful to the kind people who hire you on or who lodge you, even for a small fee.”
He snorted: “Perhaps. But I cannot speak on their behalf, only mine.” I noted that he wiggled out of that one quite ingeniously. His face shone with a strange light. An aura of mystery gradually covered it like a gossamer veil. The light suddenly went out.
“I’m sure your effort to separate yourself from the social body must be a terrible struggle,” I pursued without irony. “I believe that to be estranged from the social body is commensurate with being estranged from one’s own self. Am I right in assuming this?”
“Perhaps, but not from the individuals of those societies. I am not a misantrope. This being said, solitude, fasts and meditation have prepared me for outer trials and tribulations, which I believe, without vanity, to have overcome.” He began picking his teeth with a very long fingernail.
“And God?” I rebounded, eyeing him steadily. His lips broke into an artful grin.
“He has been my only Friend since the beginning, sir. And why is that? Because we have been useless to each other since our initial communion.” He stood, evidently undesirous to develop this rather paradoxical statement. I let it drop …
We slipped outside and my nameless companion suggested that we have a quick jaunt through the ‘Arab Market’ in Zacaten. Indeed, the weather was warm, that Autumn weather which I have always found so stimulating in Granada; Granada, perched high in her mountainous refuge like an eagle in her lofty nest. My strolling companion strolled into my reverie.
“Look at the sky, a bluish turquoise which reminds me so much of the domes of the mosques in Bukhara, Uzbekistan. That turquoise which solicits silence and contemplation.”
“So you’ve visited Uzbekistan?”
“More than visited, my friend. I lived there for five years studying under the spiritual guidance of the Nakishbendi Brotherhood, a Sunna movement founded by the Shah Nakishbend, and which has survived the anti-religious crusade of the Soviet Union. With those kind and learned monks I learnt the virtues and powers of silence, contemplation, discipline, simplicity and periodical talks.”
“In what language did you speak to them?” I ventured, a bit intrigued by this singular experience.
“In Uzbek, of course!” he responded dryly. “I also learned to read Arabic.”
“But are silence and talks not contradictory?”
“Not at all, sir. Clusters of roses certainly grow silently, but good soil, air and pure water are needed for their basic growth. If accompanied by a soft, melodious voice, they grow better. Roses heed to that voice as silence heeds to constructive talks. It was during the alternating passages of silence and talks that our spiritual guides opened our eyes and senses to the uselessness of worldly matters, and since then, this uselessness has become my second nature, even my first! Mind you, this discovery has nothing to do either with self-love or atomistic individualism. As I said, I have relations with people, albeit brief; and although I keep aloof from community aggregation and national gatherings, I have never spend my life gloating in an ivory tower. No sir, I live for wanderlust not social or individual hubris! The lust for wandering … And when one wanders one cannot but converge with people, learn from them. This does not necessarily mean that I derive an extraordinary pleasure from communicating with them. To tell the truth, I prefer my own company, if I may say so …”
“But you surely feel a responsibility towards others?” I pursued, more and more fascinated by this nameless chap, who by now had led me into a marvellous little garden out of whose spouting fountain splashed tinkling sprays here and there.
“Responsibility?” he chortled, as we sat down enjoying the perfumed scents of honeysuckles and roses. “Responsibility is only towards oneself. My words or gestures will be felt by others. Would you harm or humiliate your fellow man? Uselessness does not mean selfishness or egoism. In fact, it disciplines you to an awareness of others, an awareness those who whole-heartedly believe in social relevance will never come to understand for they must belong to a community, club or ideology in order to give pride and reason to their usefulness. They discredit the experience of uselessness. Don’t get me wrong, I do not live in a fantasy world like those who tout infinite progress or community spirit. These are abstract schemas for me. My Way is to strive to overcome anger, hate and jealousy within my own sphere of existence. This entails peeling away the veils that dim the lucidity of reality; my reality of being useless to the devastating machine of the useful well-being of mankind.”
“I would then conclude that your manner of living may be called cynical or indifferent?”
He was mortified by my question. “Cynical? A cynic questions then condemns derisively the circumstances that emerge before him or her; I neither question nor condemn. I simply carry on from place to place, experimenting novel circumstances, accepting them as if they had always been mine. Indifference? Well, if you mean stepping back and out of the world’s commerce, and not to take either that commerce or oneself seriously, then I am indifferent. The crisis of many individuals today is that they take themselves much too seriously, much more seriously than the seriousness of their work or vocations. And when this self-seriousness is struck down or dethroned a dreadful sense of uselessness seizes them, causing depression, or worse, suicide. My uselessness to myself and to others is more serious than myself. I am in the world but not of it!”
As we sat in silence, I gradually felt myself transported to another dimension of time and space. Scenes of my own life flashed before my eyes, lively colourful scenes and gloomy ones. I could not resolve whether this nameless fellow fascinated or revolted me. My own life had been ensnared in a web of social irresponsibility and imposed representations. I had become one of the many cogs in the slow and steady vast social wheel that turns and churns, and I sensed that mine had become worn-out and useless. I had so yearned to be of some use to society … But now? Yes, now? How could I restore my previous enthusiasm that had long been abandoned? I had to admit, though, that this man’s experiments heightened my ardour to … to do what? Was he sent to me like some mentor? He suddenly stood and bid me a good day with a whimsical smile, as though he had been reading my thoughts.
Before leaving, however, he said: “Tomorrow I shall have a walk in the gardens of the Alhambra. Please join me, I’m sure we have much to discuss. Meanwhile, let silence be your companion until that walk.” And he disappeared into the milling crowd.
Waking early the next morning, I resolved to meet my new and somewhat eccentric companion at the beginning of the long avenue that leads to the Gate of Justice. An avenue lined with sentinels of cypress and other trees, within whose morning freshness ran a warren of narrow paths.
We met at precisely eight o’clock. With a sort of fraternal benevolence, he took my arm and we strolled upwards past the Gate of Justice, the pompous palace of King Carlos the Fifth, paid our tickets and entered the palace proper, almost religiously, under the storied vaulted corridors, by the pencilled ornaments and tiled walls of arabesque blue, over the smooth, shiny marbled floors.
“Have you read Washington Irving?” he asked in a quavering voice, as if not to disturb the mediaeval palace denizens.
“Yes, a marvellous story-teller and keen observer,” I replied softly.
“You know he led a life of ridiculous usefulness until sojourning within the walls of this soporific fairyland. Gradually Irving fell under the pleasant and industrious spell of uselessness.”
I stopped walking.
“How so? That’s contradictory!”
“Is it?” he beamed, smiling that wide, wicked, whimsical smile. “Yet so it was. He learnt through daily experience that this whole palace of enchantment lies under the layers of absolute uselessness. Layers and layers of poetry, conversation, lyrical jousts and insignificant gestures which disappeared as quickly as they were conceived. Nothing! Nothing remains of that imagined uselessness. And that is precisely why he wrote his Tales of the Alhambra[1] ; it was out of the need to express his useless life within these lyrical stones.”
My sauntering companion fell silent. Only our footfalls could be heard weaving in and out of the slender colonnades, intermingling with the chanting fountains. The blue ceramic shone on the walls like a mirror reflecting the azure …
“I see your point, I think. Before dusk, at times I watch the sun glide from East to West over the Palace walls, the dark greys slipping into ochre reds, soon to be daubed, as the sun sets, by the overglow tones of chestnut, roan and dun.”
“Yes!” he whispered excitedly. “That is perfect uselessness. It serves absolutely no purpose to anyone … even to yourself. For, unlike Irving, who snapped his experiment in uselessness, succumbing to the desire of writing it down for all and sundry to share, I presume that in your case you have no urgency to express any posthumous glory?”
I shook my head thoughtfully, then asked: “You don’t feel the desire to keep a diary?”
“Write? A diary? What for — to satisfy my blotted ego seeking a useful outlet? These are vain insinuations, my good friend. No, it is quite enough to feast my sovereign eyes, to feed my independent emotions on this marvellous honeycomb frostwork and these fine, mullioned windows[2]. These artifices are as useless as the ephemeral poetry and conversations that rang euphoniously within the hallowed halls and courts. And indeed, why should we, mere strangers to this mediaeval marvel, impose an artificial usefulness to it all? Why should we break into lyrical extravagances of the budding rose or the flight of the owl? Into flights of phantasy poeticising upon the Towers above us where verses of love spilled forth their honied fragrances into a void of mute forgetfulness? None of that for me, sir. Within these courts and gardens I have come to the inevitable conclusion that my Destiny lies in perfect uselessness; namely, in my refusal to reanimate the beauty or the ugliness that has crossed my path for the past fifty years in Asia, Europe, the Americas and Africa. I decline to spoil the uselessness of beauty and ugliness, to encumber my spirit and soul by searching for a ‘proper use’ for such human emotions and achievements.”
We had walked through the remarkable Court of Lions and were now entering the gardens of Lindaraxa, Sultan Boadil’s[3] wife. We sat down inhaling the gay scents of roses, oranges and lemons.
He sniffed the air, then murmured: ”A vague of indescribable awe was creeping over me,” here hepaused, lifting his eyes upwards: ”Everything began to be affected by the working of my mind, the whispers of the wind among the citron-trees beneath my window had something sinister…” My companion had chanted this broken sentence in a sort of drawn-out litany. “Yes, something sinister, indeed,” he ruminated to himself. “That point of inspiration led Irving from absolute uselessness to the search for putting uselessness to use. I enjoy reading Irving, but will never convert a ‘something sinister’ to a million-copy, world-wide read book.”
The sun rose higher and higher coating the pink tongues of dawn with a purplish blue. I turned to him: “Still, I cannot see how we as humans can escape from being useful Beings!” He looked at me, his facial features had suddenly hardened, or perhaps it was due to the effects of the shadows off the sun-lit fruit trees.
“Does my speaking to you now fulfil an emotional need? Was our conversation a psychological issue to such a profound hoarding of uselessness?” I asked.
He laughed so loud that a few puffy-eyed guards turned their heads in our direction. “Dear fellow, you have hardly understood our morning jaunt. We are simply idling our time away as uselessly as possible, as useless as a leaf dropping from that citron-tree, as a person who labours all his life to survive, a hermit in his remote cave, a desert-dweller, a traveller without name or record. How many of those intrepid souls took refuge in monasteries of the East and there left no trace of their earthly footfalls? They experienced true uselessness …”
“Even to God towards whom they must have addressed their prayers?” I enquired. He raised a quizzical eyebrow.
“That is neither for you nor me to answer, my friend.” He stood, shook my hand and left the gardens back through the Palace halls.
I felt a bit put out by his prompt and unexpected departure. It were as if he had abandoned me to unravel that last enigmatic thought of his. A silly feeling of course, but one that clung to me like the scents of the roses, oranges and lemons. My mind slowly became dull, my body numb. Had the nameless wanderer put me under a magical spell? The redolence and balminess of the gardens added to my discomfiture. At the same time, however, I understood that idleness is not a state or a condition which I could bear or champion as he does. I rose, heavily. Enough of this palatial beguiling and futile jaunting. That man, whoever he is, taught me a sound lesson: a person is born into our world to accomplish a particular use, one that is his or hers alone. There is no doubt in my mind about this.
I dragged myself from the gardens back to my hotel in the Old Market at Zacatin, an effort that enlisted all my emotional and physical strength.
I must confess that during the following days, in spite of my firm resolution towards usefulness, I idled my time away seeking out that nameless idler, tramping from street to street, garden to garden, restaurant to restaurant. Every morning I rose early and scoured the halls, courts and gardens of the Alhambra.
He had vanished into thin air, as the saying goes …
*
A few years later back in Amsterdam, my eye caught sight of a book entitled The Denizen of theUnderworld : The Art of Uselessness. I bought it out of some urgent curiosity that I could and still not explain rationally. The first sentences read : ”I am without shame, without guilt, without bad conscious. I truly prefer my cave swimming with mermaids, dwarves labouring at the furnaces, fairies hunting out medicinal plants. Here I breathe the air of pure uselessness, shielded against the charm and seduction of use.”
The author of the book had an odd name — Vigilius de Silentio — a name that might have fitted the face of my nameless companion whom I had met so many years ago in Granada. On second thoughts, though, that name could have fitted any face.
To tell the truth, the book bored me to death …
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[1] Washington Irving, edition Edilux, Granada, Spain.
[2] A vertical element made of wood or stone that divides a window in two. It is applied in Islamic and Armenian architecture.
[3] The last Sultan of Muslim Spain, exiled to North Africa.
Paul Mirabile is a retired professor of philology now living in France. He has published mostly academic works centred on philology, history, pedagogy and religion. He has also published stories of his travels throughout Asia, where he spent thirty years.
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PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL
Painting by Joseph Mallord William Turner (1775-1851); From Public Domain
I’ve performed upon many stages of the World
Have donned many masks,
Am today like a ship whose sails furled
Floats listlessly upon the horizonless seas of uncertainty.
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Passed are those days of fury and adventure,
Of desert crossings, mountain passes and oceanic swells ;
The hour has come to lie down and venture
Forth towards a novel existence of tolling kneels.
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All has become pensive, still and Silent
Amidst the glorious illumination of nightly bidding ;
Where vivid Dreams and Tales invent
An irrevocable identity, so unexpected, yet so fitting.
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Paul Mirabile is a retired professor of philology now living in France. He has published mostly academic works centred on philology, history, pedagogy and religion. He has also published stories of his travels throughout Asia, where he spent thirty years.
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PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL
We live on a huge planet, a watery world, which is a small cosmos in itself.Keith Lyons discovers humanity in his local swimming pool.
In recent years, I’ve increasingly sought an elixir of life. Even though I know this magical potion won’t grant me eternal life — not even eternal youth. The elixir doesn’t even promise to cure all diseases, though it seems a lot of other people are taking this tonic as treatment for every kind of ailment.
My pursuit of this higher realm means that most days, if I am able, I take a break from work, life and the busy-ness of it all to replenish, relax, and rejuvenate. My woo-woo astrological friend reckons that because my star sign is Cancer (one of the three water signs along with Pisces and Scorpio), I am drawn to water. But then, we all need water. Water is Life. It keeps all life going – for without water, life cannot exist. As the saying goes, “No Blue – No Green.” We need water to survive, to thrive, for our hygiene, for our wellbeing, and for the ice cubes in our virgin piña colada cocktails.
When I heard about the prospect of a new swimming pool opening up nearby my home, in the dark days of the Covid-pandemic, I was doubly happy and expectant. I even turned up to the new venue before it had actually opened, when they were still finishing the build and checking all the systems worked. The local government funded facility offered not only a swimming pool, but also a point of contact for interactions with the council, and the pool was twinned with a modern library. In my mind, I imagined that it might be possible to go swimming, then to glide over to a cafe or bar to get a drink, and then to select a book to read while reclining on an in-water lounger. Could it possible? I know I had stayed at a fancy hotel with a wet bar in Macau, where the bartender served cocktails to me and a photographer as we lived our best lives — until the next morning when we didn’t feel so flash.
Water, as you may know, makes up over 70% of the Earth’s surface. Up to 60% of the human body is actually water — depending on how much fluids you’ve drunk. A cucumber is made up of around 96% water. I recall these facts from a high school science project as I push the button of the water dispenser and a half circle of cool water arcs up for me to catch as much as I can in my mouth. I’m thirsty and know I need to drink lots of fluids, as I’ve just spent the last 80 minutes exercising and soaking in warm water. And I feel like I’m dehydrated from all the exertion.
Ever since a new indoor swimming pool opened in my neighbourhood, I’ve been making the effort to go as often as I can, to move and stretch in the warm hydrotherapy pool and then relax in the even-hotter spa. It has become something of a pilgrimage for me, even on the coldest, rainy days of winter. My route there from my house goes along a new cycleway, through a park (where a dog recently tried to attack me on my bike) cuts through a local ‘secret shortcut’ beside offices and a new church, then tracks along an industrial area of factories, warehouses, and commercial premises. After 6pm, the road to the pool has little traffic, just the occasional truck and security vehicle. If road conditions, traffic and winds are favourable, I can be door-to-door in under 10 minutes. But once I enter the new complex, change into my swimming gear, and walk down the ramp of the hydrotherapy pool, time becomes less important. I change from the demands of a busy world to more me-time.
But there’s more than devoting an hour to honour and exercise one’s physical body. Moving in water offers benefits beyond the physical realm, whether one’s aim is to help the heart, the waistline or the body’s strength. Because water is a lot denser than air, water provides more resistance — around 12-14% — compared to doing the same exercises on land. That resistance assists cardio and strength training. There’s another factor for water-based activities: buoyancy. The feeling of being lighter or weightless when submerged in water means you take the pressure off bones, joints and muscles. It is the closest thing you or I might get to being in space. You don’t even need one of those NASA t-shirts with the iconic blue, red and white logo of the National Aeronautics and Space Administration.
The 1.4-metre-deep hydrotherapy pool, which is kept at 33-36C, sits alongside the traditional 25-metre swimming pool, which is kept at 26-28C. The therapeutic pool’s inclusion in the new community complex was the result of lobbying by locals, who previously had to drive across to the opposite side of the city to access a suitably warm pool.
Photo Courtesy: Keith Lyons
It has only been a few months since the pool opened, but already many come to the waters, from when it opens at 5.30am each weekday (7am weekends) to when the last are forced to leave at 9.30pm (8pm in weekends). I’m more of an afternoon and evening swimmer, preferring to go to the pool after work or at the end of the day. Some attend the twice-a-week gentle exercise class, where the average age is 65+. Others visit almost every day at nearly the same time.
Some arrive in wheelchairs, pushing walking frames, or hobbling on crutches. Others walk from the changing rooms to the water smiling expectantly as they pace towards the transformative pool. At mid-morning, with the light from the wall-to-ceiling windows slanting across the pool, it could easily be a scene from the 1985 movie, Cocoon, where the retirement home pool helped them rediscover their youth (it was full of aliens). If you had to paint the scene, there would be a lot of blue hues, along with off-white and grey tones, with silvery reflections off the water.
While some exercise by themselves, focusing on their routines, the set prescribed by their physiotherapist, or whatever takes their fancy, for many it is also a social time, as they aqua jog up and down the lengths, or stand at the sides doing calisthenics. If you listen carefully over the music soundtrack of upbeat, positive songs playing over the public speakers, you can hear the water gushing and flowing. It bubbles up from the floor of the pool. Jets roll in from the sides of the hydrotherapy pool. In the spa pool, there’s a force field strategically placed around the pool. Modern water treatment means there’s no smell of chlorine.
The pool is a very tactile, sensual in-body experience. It is also somewhat humbling. Patrons must change into suitable bathing costumes, which can be as skimpy and revealing as bikinis and togs, though some prefer full body covering for modesty or self-perceptions. The water in the hydrotherapy pool is so warm that there’s never any hesitation on entering. People are only limited by the speed at which they can move from the air environment to the watery world of buoyancy and drag.
My local swimming pool is a microcosm of the wider community, and the big wide world. As where I live has experienced significant migration in recent decades, it is certainly a diverse multi-national cross-section of the community. Chinese are the largest group, with a swim school, coached sometimes in Mandarin, operating most weeknights. There are also families from the Philippines, a group of learn-to-swimmers from Nepal, and occasionally a non-swimmer from India who needs to be rescued from the deep end of the main pool by lifeguards. On one afternoon and evening, the whole pool becomes ‘women-only’, with the blinds drawn so women can use the pools without the glare of men. With more refugees from other countries now making up our neighbourhood, there are often people from Afghanistan, Eritrea, Kurdistan, Ethiopia, Somalia and Bhutan venturing into the pools for the first time.
Is the swimming pool I go to special? Can such a multi-sensory, multi-cultural, relaxing-yet-reviving experience only be found in my swimming pool? Nope. Seek out a public swimming pool in your area and discover another world.
Photo Courtesy: Keith Lyons
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Keith Lyons (keithlyons.net) is an award-winning writer and creative writing mentor originally from New Zealand who has spent a quarter of his existence living and working in Asia including southwest China, Myanmar and Bali. His Venn diagram of happiness features the aroma of freshly-roasted coffee, the negative ions of the natural world including moving water, and connecting with others in meaningful ways. A Contributing Editor on Borderless journal’sEditorial Board, his work has appeared in Borderless since its early days, and his writing featured in the anthology Monalisa No Longer Smiles.
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PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL.
Christopher Columbus (1451-1506)From Public Domain
I, Roberto Mendoza, in this year 1550, ship’s boy on Christopher Columbus’ first and second voyages to the West Indies before my promotion to sailor on his third and fourth voyages, testify to the veracity of the eye witness events that I record for posterity. And in spite of their devastating raw truth, it is my troubled conscious that has conducted my hand, goaded my intelligence to write down these sorrowful facts. For facts they are, regardless of the prestige and boons that Columbus received from his protectors and admirers.
Where shall I begin? How do I burrow through the layers of unquestionable fame that has marked that name to reverberate with the clanking of the slave chains, the death rattles in the gold and silver mines, the gnashing of teeth, the hangings and dismemberments … the insensible apathy of the subjugation or submission of the Indian masses?
It has always appeared to my young eyes that Columbus’ achievements were enveloped in an aura of mystery or incomprehension. I may even add an aura of fantastic falsifications, mainly initiated and authorised by Columbus himself and his unquestioning gallants.
I knew him well, too well to be duped by those seductive charms of his, that subtle cunning, a mask donned whenever a fruitful occasion arose, yet under which lay a brutal, tyrannical individual bent on attaining his greatest ambition: wealth and glory, and this at any price. What was the little ditty that some fool invented for innocent children and naive adults to recite: “In fourteen ninety-two Columbus sailed the ocean blue?” A ridiculous rime to recall that wretched year. Yes, I say that wretched year for it celebrated the Genoan hero’s glorious voyage.
During that fatal year of 1492, two other major events occurred in Spain which I believe to be in relation to Columbus’ conniving his way into Isabella’s confidence: the expulsion of the Jews to North Africa, Italy and Constantinople, and the capitulation of Granada, the last stronghold of the Muslims in Spain, to the Christian kings. Henceforth, Spain rid herself of those ‘impure’, centuries-laden ‘foreign’ plunderers. Did not Columbus write in his logbook (if we are to believe Bartolomé de Las Casas’s transcribed copy of it) that he was overjoyed by those two events: ”thus you (the Monarchs) have turned out all the Jews from your kingdoms and lordships”, and ”the royal banners have been placed on the towers of Alhambra”[1].
This being said, because of the expulsion and the reconquest, Columbus’ true birthplace had to be concealed, for any negotiation with Isabella or Ferdinand. This hero was not born in the city of spaghetti and banks, Genova, as commonly known. The darling of the Spanish monarchy was born in the land of the corsairs, in Calvi, a lovely port town in Northern Corsica, indeed conquered by the Genovans and governed by them during five centuries, but none the less born and bred far from the banks of Italy. Corsica, where for centuries Vandals, Ostrogoths, Greeks and Lombards, and ill-bred Aragonese and Genovans vied for domination, intermingling, integrating and assimilating.
Why would Columbus lie about his place of birth? Was it out of fear of a possible ‘corsair descent’? One that connoted piratry, pillage and other misdeeds [2]? Be that as it may, the rogue managed to cajole Queen Isabella into giving him enough maravedis[3]to undertake a voyage that would heighten the glory of the conquering Spanish Monarchy and the new-founded kingdom.
And that was how Admiral Don Christopher Columbus frayed his way to fame and fortune!
With the Queen’s glittering maravedis he commissioned three caravels : the Nina, the Pinta and the Santa Maria, the third of which he navigated himself, the other two by the Pinzón brothers. How I happened to be aboard the Santa Maria is a long story with which I shall not bore my readers.
So there he stood at the prow, mantled in a vaporous circle of pride and arrogance whilst we, his sea-faring companions, sweated away on deck or in the hold, were fed rotten food, furled and unfurled the sails without respite, hunted out the innumerable rats that ran amok below, withered under the insufferable heat of September. I myself almost fainted under the long, long hours of tedious work, boredom and especially fear; fear that we and our tiny caravel, surrounded by thousands of leagues of far from blue waters, would be food for the horrible undersea monsters that had swallowed many a brave crew and their vessels with yawning jaws and leathery tentacles. All of us were terrified, and the five weeks we spent crossing a swelling ocean towards the East, or so we all thought, triggered a feeling of panic, alienness and remorse. The admiral described the ocean like a river; I myself felt like a cork in a rainswept pond, jostled and jolted, no land in sight, our water and meat, taken aboard at the Canary Islands, foul-tasting, half-eaten by the enormous black rats.
Did the great Admiral not consult the stars? Eastward? There was nothing — only rolls and rolls of higher and higher walls of water battering the fragile sides of our vessels. And I, so young, asked myself time and time again, how did an incompetent sea-faring fellow like Columbus ever win the confidence of Isabella and Ferdinand ? Oh how I recall his bulky figure at the prow, oftentimes behind the helm, screaming orders or simply staring out into the watery vastitude, dreaming no doubt of gold … gold … and more gold … He had written the word ‘gold’ seventy-five times in his logbook during the first two weeks of our crossing!
How many of our poor sailors had been beaten for insubordination, had suffered the excruciating trial of keelhauling[4], one or two even hanged for attempting mutiny, so fearful were they of being devoured by sea monsters, dying of thirst or hunger or being bitten by the furry rats that thrived below in our beds of straw?
At long last I heard the cry “Land ahoy!” coming from the crow’s nest. Yes, we finally reached a cluster of islands that would be named Guanahani[5], Cuba, Haiti and the Dominican Republic on the maps of future cartographers. It was on these islands that my first glimpses of a barbaric and despotic Columbus would not only be corroborated, but magnified to the heights of psychopathic insanity. For it became more and more evident to me that the Admiral, whom I considered in my youthful age as a hero, had no intentions of treating the indigenous peoples of these islands either as equals or with a soupçon of humane sympathy. He indeed judged them somewhat higher than animals, yet whose only human value was how much they would bring him as slaves sold in Spain, or how much gold and silver they would extract for him from the mines and rivers. All he saw in these peaceful peoples was the glitter of gold fastened to their noses and the rings of equal glitter hanging off their ears and arms. He saw gold everywhere, even gold stones shining in the rivers! He wrote in his logbook that gold grew in clusters and could be plucked off trees like fruit!
The way in which he ferreted information out of the Indians about gold deposits turned my stomach. His obsession with gold drove him into periodical frenzies during which time he would beat, even torture the poor indigenous man or woman who failed to locate the deposits. He spent his sweltering nights tossing and turning in bed, totally possessed by this maniacal craving.
But his brutality was not limited in this direction: The Spaniards or other Europeans who disobeyed him or sought to outmanoeuvre him in the pursuit of power or riches were tracked down and hanged, accused of criminal acts. His barbarity knew no bounds, nor his slave-selling which began to enrich him immensely.
On our second and third voyages, which led us to the islands of Granada and Tobago, the abundance of gold extracted was tantamount to the number of Indians he enslaved for his own ‘household’ purposes, and those he sold into a slavery which by then had become a thriving, lucrative business. We navigated from island to island sowing the seeds of destruction as the stoic Admiral described their beauty, the exotic animals and birds, and especially the immense, awaiting riches buried under that beauty. How many of the indigenous he had killed when several tribes revolted against him, and how many committed suicide cannot be accurately tallied. I would learn much later that Las Casas put that tally at 1,500 Taion Arawaks.
Indeed, as time went by Columbus’ wrath found merciless outlets against Indians and Europeans alike as the settlements grew in economic and political importance. Indians who failed to extract enough gold from the mines had one of their arms cut off[6]. On many occasions he had rebellious Spaniards dismembered in public much to the outrage of the governors appointed to the settlements by the Spanish Monarchy.
The governors of these settlements began sending reports to the King and Queen relating the horrendous behaviour of Columbus, his obsession for power and riches, his masquerading as a ruling god-like figure over the ignorant natives. Testimonies piled higher and higher on the Queen’s pearl-inlaid writing-table, relating cases of rape, murder and mutilation.
On his return trip to Spain she immediately had him seized, chained and thrown into prison. She also expropriated all his extorted possessions, be they gold or land. There he rotted away for six weeks, so enraged was the Queen, betrayed by this ‘foreigner’. However, his brother Bartholomew, on his knees, pleaded tearfully in favour of his brother’s heart of gold, his innocence in all matters of governance, having been slandered by the governors and their lackeys who wrote defamatory reports to wreak vengeance upon a man whose glory and greatness surpassed theirs. The Queen hesitated. It was King Ferdinand who decided to have him released.
His release from prison had puffed up his ego, unlocked his megalomania.
Columbus’ fourth and last voyage, between 1502 and 1504 with four caravels, took us to Martinique, Honduras, Jamaica, Costa Rica and Nicaragua. I had been appointed a full-fledged sailor by then and relished the idea of accompanying the Admiral, jotting down all his actions, prudently of course, so that I would not to be arrested for bearing witness to his ruthlessness, perhaps even hanged as a traitor. The ‘civilising’ process undertaken by him included plundering, murdering, enslaving and mutilation. Amidst the unbridled violence and sadism, he posed as an evangelist, a disinterested zealot deeply desirous to convert the ‘savages’ into God-fearing Christians, into ‘civilised’ beings like himself.
Columbus returned to Spain a hero of piety, magnanimity, sanctity. The impostor even wrote two books : the Book of Privileges[7] in 1502, an indecent mass of statistics which enumerate all his accumulated rewards wrested from the Crown under which lay the beaten and mutilated bodies of the indigenous, and the Book of Prophecies[8] in 1505, a shameful scream of smut comprising hundreds of citations from the Bible, all of which spell out in his vapid style his Christian ‘mission’ in the New World, ever so charitable and lenient towards the ignorant, child-like ‘natives’ ; a mission, indeed, pure in spirit, rightful in act.
With Columbus’ death the unwarrantable fervour that he had kindled slowly shrivelled into ashes. I retired from sea-life and found work in the Custom’s Bureau, a most comfortable employment. Besides, I was disgusted by all the tales told about him by the sailors, especially their bawdy narratives about the native women in the New World. I wished to leave my sea-legs behind and tread more earthy paths. Furthermore, my new tasks gave me ample time to read the posthumous reports about Columbus[9], many of which belied the benignant deeds and bountiful achievements of the monarchial and New World idol. It was after these important readings that I decided to begin my memoirs …
The rogue’s Book of Prophecies created quite a stir amongst the aristocratic castes : Columbus’ fantasies of promoting Isabella and Ferdinand as heads of a new crusade to the Holy Lands to defeat the Muslims, and there spread Christianity kindled many a nostalgic and gun-ho heart. The monarchs, wary of the old Admiral’s apocalyptic inaccuracies and religious bigotry, never took him seriously. I wonder if they had even read his book …
None the less, Columbus certainly provided an excellent example for other freebooters to follow in the wake of his doughty adventures. The slave trade between the Old and the New World thrived as well as the gold and silver that flooded the Spanish markets. It is no mere metaphor that this period in Spain was called as El Siglo de Oro (The Golden Century).
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[1] Bartolome de Las Casas (1484-1566) a Dominicain priest who spent forty years in Hispaniola (Haiti and the Domican Republic) transcribed an abstract of Columbus’ lost logbook. How accurate or truthful is this copy is difficult to assess. Journal of the First Voyage of Christopher Columbus (1492-1493), translated by Clements R. Markhma : London, Hakluyt Society, 1893, pp. 15-93
[2] Corsica : Columbus’ Isle, Joseph Chiari, edition Barrie and Rockcliff, 1960.
[3] Gold coins used in mediaeval Spain during the 11th and 14th centuries.
[4] A maritime punishment by which the sailor is ‘hauled’ under the ‘keel’ of the ship with ropes.
[5] As called by the Indians. Columbus called this island San Salvador. Today it is called Watling.
[6] On this point see Howard Zinn, Christopher Columbus and Western Civilization, Open Magazine Pamphlet Series, 1992.
[7]El Libro de Privilegios. The English edition : Book of Privileges, The Claiming of the New World, John W. Hessler, 2014.
[8]El Libro de Profesías. The English edition : Book of Prophecies, Repertorium Columbianum, Blair Sullivan, 2004.
[9] Columbus and Las Casas : Two Readings on the Legacy of Columbus(1542 (The Devastation of the Indians. A brief Account) and 1550 (In Defense of the Indians).
Paul Mirabile is a retired professor of philology now living in France. He has published mostly academic works centred on philology, history, pedagogy and religion. He has also published stories of his travels throughout Asia, where he spent thirty years.
PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL
A Self-Portrait with Seven Fingers by Marc Chagall (1887-1985). From Public Domain
Tommy ordered a second pint of beer at the counter. The bar buzzed with the usual crowd, and a few groups of tourists, mostly from northern Europe, were beering it up as they did at home. Tommy had had a long day preparing breakfast and clearing the rooms at the Hotel Van Acker, Jan Willem Brouwersstraat, 14. Afterwards, he accompanied three Spanish tourists to the ‘high’ spots of Amsterdam: Anne Frank’s house, Vondel Park, the Rijks and Stedelijk museums, Rembrandthuis, Madame Tussauds, completing his tour at the ‘hot’ spot for all such tourists — the red light district. There he left the Spaniards, tired of having dragged them about the town while straining to understand their Spanish.
How long had he been at it ? Four … five years ? Who knows. Something in his mind had snapped. Oftentimes he suffered from bouts of amnesia or blackouts, a succession of synapse that triggered in him extreme panic, even paranoia. He felt an elbow nudge him lightly in the ribs: “ All right, mate?” asked a middle-aged man with long, blond, silken hair and ultramarine blue eyes.
Tommy eyed the man suspiciously. He had managed to squeeze himself in at the counter as imperceptibly as a ghost. “Yes, I’m all right. Why?”
“Oh, I just saw you staring into space as if you were in great thought or pain.” Tommy smiled leerily.
“No pain, just thinking small thoughts.” The other smiled. His teeth were very white. He reached over, took a few pinches of tobacco from a drinker’s pouch with unabashed effrontery and rolled himself a cigarette.
“Do you do that often?” Tommy enquired lamely.
“What?” the other asked puffing away dreamily.
“Pinch tobacco from people’s pouches.”
“Of course I do, it’s been my custom for ages,” answered the tobacco pincher with a whimsical gleam in his eyes. “What are you doing in Amsterdam, working I suppose?”
Tommy straightened up. “I work at the Hotel Van Acker doing odd jobs for the owner.”
“Ah, yes, Van Acker … Where they found that murdered dwarf.”
“He wasn’t murdered. He died of a heart attack.”
“The police never found the key to his room. That is strange. To die of a heart attack in a hotel room without the key.”
“So what?”
“Sounds a bit shadowy to me. But that’s all in the past. And who cares anyway, right ? What’s your name?”
“Tommy.”
“From?”
Tommy hesitated: “From Luton.”
“Luton?”
“It’s in Bedsfordshire.”
The pincher of tobacco nodded, rolling himself another cigarette. “I’ve seen you handing out leaflets or pamphlets in the streets.”
“That’s possible.”
“How’s the salary at Van Acker’s?”
“I get on. Van Acker gives me my meals and I sleep in the cellar room under the stairway.”
There was a very long silence — a silence so long that Tommy began to grow nervous. Finally, the man said: “Listen, I might have a job for you Tommy that will earn you enough money to live like a prince anywhere in the world for the rest of your life. One night ! Only one night, and you’ll become as rich as Crassus.”
“Who’s Crassus?” asked Tommy mistrustfully. The other laughed.
“The richest man in the Roman Empire. You see, my proposition deals with paintings; I’m an art collector.”
“Pictures? I like pictures. I take all my hotel tourists to the art museums.”
“Perfect. Here’s my address. Come by any time after eight at night. By the way, my name is Gustav.”
“Gustav … Gustav what?”
“Gustav Beekhot. I hope to see you soon, Tommy. Tot ziens[1]!” Gustav slapped Tommy on the shoulder and left the crowded bar, weaving through the mass of throbbing, bulky bodies like a shadow amidst a darkening, nameless stretch of land …
Five days later, after having wrestled with his thoughts, Tommy leaned his bicycle at the gate of a plank which led to Gustav’s house-boat on the Ruysdaelkade Canal. It was quite an impressive barge. He knocked at the door. Gustav, eyes a watery blue, opened the door and wished his visitor a hearty welcome ‘aboard’. “Just in time for dinner,” he said flippantly. When Tommy stepped in he couldn’t believe his eyes: they swept over a long ‘hold’ full of paintings of all sizes and colours, some hanging off the walls, others on easels, and still others scattered on the uncarpeted ‘bottom deck’, unfinished.
“You might open a museum here,” he suggested, strolling from painting to painting. “I like to look at pictures. When I accompany people to the Rijks or to the Rembrandthuis I always take my time to examine the pictures. The tourists just look at the title and at the name of the painter.”
“Yes, very few people really examine a painting.” Gustav placed two bowls of rice, shredded carrots and two pints of Heineken beer on a hackney table. “I for one prefer to paint them, buy or sell them, although I do often go to the museums for inspiration.”
“You sell your own pictures, then?” Gustav chuckled.
He gave Tommy a conspiratorial wink: “No, who would ever buy a Gustav Beekhot ? To tell you the truth I sell the ones I steal or have stolen from museums or from private collectors.” Tommy, who had sat down at the table dropped his fork. He stared at Gustav in disbelief. All that had been said with absolute aplomb. “Yes, Tommy my lad, sometimes I do buy them from contemporary Scandinavian painters living in poverty, but I prefer to steal them … It’s cheaper!”
“But … but how can you steal a picture from a museum?” questioned Tommy in alarm.
“It’s quite simple. It’s a question of know-how. Thievery is an art, my dear lad. And if you are willing, you will learn this art easily, and by doing so, earn a half a million dollars!”
Tommy jumped up. “No, please, let us eat, and I shall spell out all the niceties to you. There’s really nothing to it: a wiry, loose-limbed body like yours, will-power and the common sense to keep your mouth shut. And I do believe you possess all those aforesaid qualities. Am I correct?” Tommy remained voiceless. “Of course you possess them. But you doubt my word. Others too doubted, and today are living like kings in Tahiti, the Seychelles or in some Central American country.”
“A half a million dollars?” Tommy managed to stammer, sitting down slowly as Gustav glided between his paintings in a breezy, phantasmal gait to procure a bottle of Jenever in his kitchenette at the ‘prow’.
“Yes, Tommy. One night. One night only.” Tommy peered out the ‘porthole’, it had begun to drizzle. He watched as the drops gently fell upon the unruffled canal waters; they fell gently, rocking his host’s barge dreamily. He suddenly felt a seizure coming on. He strained to control it, the house-boat rocking … rocking so gently, like the drops of drizzle. Something snapped in his head; he shook it out. Gustav ate his rice and carrots as if he noticed nothing of the crisis that his visitor, and future accomplice, was suffering. He was smiling that engaging smile.
“What do I have to do?” came Tommy’s belated reply in spite of himself. He had asked that without being fully conscious of actually asking it.
Gustav stopped eating, sized him up, then thrust his taunt face forward. It had a ghostly white appearance to it: “Crawl through a very very narrow tunnel about two hundred metres long behind the Zadelhoff Café to the storage room of the Stedelijk museum. In that storage room you will find a painting by Marc Chagall, A Self-Portrait with Seven Fingers, which will be waiting for you to cut out of its frame with a razor blade. The nightwatchman has already put the painting exactly where you will pop up from the storage room hole.”
Gustav stood, went to a broken, plastic shelf over his wash-basin and picked up a razor-blade. “Look, this is how it should be done.” And the art dealer began to cut out a painting from its frame. Tommy gasped. The other laughed. “Don’t worry, it’s one of my worst chefs-d’oeuvre …” Gustave then rolled up the canvas and placed it into a plastic cylinder. “There you have it my boy,” he beamed. “Sling the cylinder over your shoulder, drop down into the hole and crawl back through the tunnel where I shall be waiting for you.”
“But this tunnel … I can’t see …” Gustav put up a hand.
“The tunnel was dug during the second world war and used either to store ammunition by the local militia or as an escape route for Jews and communists.”
“How do you know all this?” Tommy asked incredulously.
“I studied history, and have many friends who deal in these particular matters.” There was a shrewd, impish twinkle in his host’s eyes.
Tommy seemed a bit sceptical about the whole operation. Gustav’s eyes were all alit, the glow of which stabbed at his distrustful heart. Gustav noted his guest’s wavering emotions. “My buyer will be in Amsterdam in five days,” he proceeded in a haunting undertone. “He’s arriving from Tampa, Florida and will be paying me one million three hundred thousand dollars for the painting. You will receive five-hundred thousand.”
He went to a drawer. “Here, this bank card will permit you to withdraw your share of the profits in any bank machine in the world. It’s a Swiss Banker’s card. But under no circumstances must you withdraw more than two thousand a day; bank administrators may become suspicious.”
“Where’s my bank?”
“That I cannot tell you,” Gustav answered sharply. “I suspect that you are mistrustful of me?” he chaffed.
“No, I’m not, but still …”
“No buts. The card is perfectly valid once the money has been deposited. And it will be after your mission has been completed. But I warn you Tommy, you must leave Amsterdam immediately before the museum authorities realise that the Chagall has been stolen. My buyer will leave on a morning flight back to Florida.”
At that moment Gustav poured out two glasses of Jenever, raised his and cried — ‘Godverdomme’ [2]! And with that coarse shout they both gulped down the divine nectar. Tommy felt a mounting tension in his chest, throat and jaw. Had he made a pact with a man whom he hardly knew ? He left at midnight, benumbed, as if he were a bit tight.
For two days Tommy struggled to control his taut emotions. To weigh the consequences of this incredible proposition. He could become immensely rich after a few hours of mental and physical toil, yet something irked him. It all seemed so unreal! He walked the streets of Amsterdam in the late afternoons, flicking matches into the air one after the other, watching the lit sticks glide gently to the street where the last lingering sparks sizzled out. He repeated aloud, “Tahiti, the Seychelles … I wonder where they are?” over and over again. He would take out the bank card and study it carefully. “It looks real to me,” he assured himself, albeit nervously.
On the fourth afternoon they met for tea at the Zadelhoff Café, after which Gustav took Tommy behind the café and showed him the sewer lid which led to the tunnel. Then they strolled over to the Stedelijk Museum, and whilst promenading through the halls of paintings Gustave cautiously pointed out the storage room where the Chagall had been stored for a future exhibition at another museum. All that day Tommy had admired the art collector’s professionalism and precision in elucidating the details of this very risky, but lucrative operation.
“Will-power, nerve and stamina, my lad,” Gustav kept repeating until he told Tommy to meet him that very night behind the Zadelhoff Café at one o’clock sharp. The buyer had booked a morning flight back to Florida. “One night ! Only one night, my friend. Don’t let us down … “ Tommy clenched his fists. He suddenly felt a surge of unwonted force, a force he had experienced many years ago before his unexpected arrival in Amsterdam. Gustav slapped him on the shoulder and glided away like a phantom in the reddening twilight …
A far away church-tower bell struck the hour of one. And so it happened, happened like a dream …
Gustav cut a spectral figure outlined against an ill-lit, moonless night as he waited impatiently for his accomplice. At that moment Tommy arrived, a trifle late. They both set immediately to work to open the heavy sewer lid. Once pried open, Tommy climbed down the rusty rungs, a torch in hand, the plastic cylinder slung over his shoulder. “The rats! The rats!” he called, looking up, his lithe body trembling.
“Rats ? The rats will scramble away when you train your torch-light on them,” Gustav shouted down in a weird, stilted voice. “Don’t talk nonsense ; just move on …”
And he slid the sewer lid over the hole. Tommy stopped. Darkness engulfed him. The boy panicked. — All alone! All alone! — he lisped to himself in fear. He nevertheless carried on down into the damp darkness training the light along the broken stone walls dripping with age. There, the opening of the tunnel! It was true. There was the tunnel … But so narrow … so terribly narrow …
Poor Tommy was hardly able to push himself into the opening. He began to cry. He felt he had been buried alive in a toolless coffin. All alone! All alone! “Mummy!” escaped from his dry, chapped lips. Yet Tommy crawled on and on. The thought of a half million dollars flooded his inflamed brain. The brave boy elbowed a painstaking trail over root and rock, his torch-light cutting out a thin stream of blissful light that disappeared into a dark Nothingness. A Nothingness that frightened him, reminded him of vague scenes in some other life that he had once led, a former life of battling and crying out in a moonless, raging darkness …
His head struck stone. Yes, it was stone! The gallant Tommy had reached the museum storage hole. He straightened up with difficulty, touched the cold walls; a ladder had been provided for the Second World War escapees.
“The rest will be child’s play,” he whispered in an echoless vacuum. Up he clambered excitedly. The hole seemed endlessly deep. Was that possible ? Ah, the floor tile … Finally. He pushed it open as easy as that. “Child’s play,” he sniggered as if speaking to Gustav.
Tommy pulled himself out into a deep, deep darkness. A darkness he had never experienced before. He searched for the razor-blade in his trouser pocket, trained his torch …
A merciless neon light suddenly blinded him, absorbing all the darkness, save that which still lay heavy and hauntingly in his head. Four policemen stood pointing at him, laughing and laughing. A very stoutish, well-dressed man stepped out from the policemen and grabbed the boy by the scruff of the neck. “So this is the little twit that has been hiding out like a rat!” the man chidded in broken English. “Hiding in the storage pit, hey? Think you’d slip away from us? What on earth are you doing in here you scamp, playing hide and seek?” Tommy said nothing. Baffled, he had lost all contact with reality. “Deaf and dumb, hey? Let’s see.” One of the police officers struck the boy across the face.
“Please don’t,” he whimpered.
“There you are, he can speak after all, and with a British accent, too,” pursued the well-dressed man who happened to be the museum director. “So, why are you hiding here ? What are you doing in that pit? Look at the mess you’ve made.” Indeed, the storage hole was filled with empty cracker and potato chip bags that Tommy had been eating. “Were you drinking water from the lavatory tap ? Look at this floor, there’s water all over it.” He poked Tommy in the chest.
“I was sent to steal a picture … Marc Chagall …”
“Steal a painting ? A Marc Chagall ? How were you to get it out of the museum ? Are you masquerading as Honest Jack[3] ?” This was asked with biting irony.
“Through the tunnel back to the Zadelhoff café.”
“Oh, I see … a tunnel to the Zadelhoff café.” He turned to the policemen: “Is there a tunnel to the Zadelhoff café.” All the policemen laughed and laughed, pointing at the sulking boy whose filthy, ill-smelling clothes struck a grotesque contrast with the museum director’s well-tailored suit.
“And with a razor-blade cut it out of its frame,” Tommy hurriedly added.
“Where’s the razor-blade?” one of the policemen demanded, taking him by the arm. “Give it to me.” Tommy searched his pockets. He held out a safety-pin.
“No tunnel, no razor-blade,” broke in the museum director. “You’re either a liar or a raving lunatic.”
“But I crawled through it. Gustav Beekhof showed me the tunnel and told me to steal the picture when he invited me to his house-boat,” Tommy pleaded, tears flowing over the dark shadows of his wild, tired eyes.
“There is no tunnel you little liar!” screamed a policeman. “And who is this Gustav Beekhot? Where is his house-boat?”
Tommy racked his brains: “I don’t know the exact address but I can take you there.”
He was hustled out of the museum into the moonless night, bundled into a police van and off they sped through, along and over streets, canals and bridges … until …
“There, on the Ruysdaelkade Canal,” the boy shouted in triumph. “His house-boat is the second …” Tommy stared in horror: there was no house-boat ! A police officer pulled him out of the van and dragged him to the slip where the house-boat should have been docked. Tommy rubbed his red, stinging eyes : “But it was there … I …”
“Shut-up you impudent little runt!” the officer barked. “I’ll check.” He returned to the van.
A few minutes later, he returned. “There’s no house-boat registered in that slip, and we have no record of a Gustav Beekhof,” he stated stiffly, looking hard at Tommy. “You’re raving mad.” A bewildered Tommy stepped back, his thoughts running riot.
“No house-boat. No Gustav Beekhof,” fumed the police officer. “A little scamp of a thief, that’s what you are.” And he twisted Tommy’s ear until it turned beet-red. “What’s your name, boy?”
“My name ? My name is Outis,” he lisped, holding his smarting ear.
“And your papers?”
“Papers ? I have no papers … I’m …”
“Shut-up!” the police officer stormed, turning red. He took Tommy by the shoulders and shook him so hard that his teeth chattered. All of a sudden something snapped in his brain. The boy was seized by a mounting tension which sent him spiralling into a dark nothingness that he had never before experienced — a nothingness where he drifted through a darkened, nameless stretch of land …
DOCTOR VAN DIJK’S REPORT
The patient who calls himself Outis, as recorded by the police, most probably English-born, was found hiding in the Stedelijk museum storage room for two days with, according to the patient, the intention of stealing Marc Chagall’s ‘A Self-Portrait with Seven Fingers‘, which the aforesaid patient claimed had been deposited in the room for that purpose. This claim was disclaimed by the museum director, Mister Aalbers who avowed that the painting hangs in its usual place in the museum. The patient being questioned by the police, maintained that he was put up to the supposed theft by a certain Gustav Beekhof who apparently does not exist, according to police records, nor does his place of residence: a house-boat on the Ruysdaelkade Canal. The patient was promised a half a million dollars for the theft, which, as he declared, was undertaken by crawling through a tunnel from behind the Zadelhoff Café to the museum storage room. The police confirm that this tunnel has never existed. Furthermore, when the patient showed the police his bank card with which he was to withdraw his share of the theft, it turned out to be a library card whose owner’s name and library location had been thoroughly effaced beyond deciphering.
The patient has fallen into a coma for several days now. There seems to be no doubt that he is suffering from an acute case of schizophrenia, caused perhaps by a sudden mental or physical traumatism that has created an imaginary parallel world through which the patient wanders in and out whenever jolted by an unsual event or encounter.
The patient thus will remain in our clinic under strict observation until he emerges from his unconscious state.
Chief Psychologist of the Psychotherapierpraktijk Overtoom
[2] ‘God damn it’ in Dutch. A rather ‘informal’ interjection when making a toast amongst close friends.
[3] The notorious English robber John Jack (1702-1724). He was hanged for his daring thefts.
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Paul Mirabile is a retired professor of philology now living in France. He has published mostly academic works centred on philology, history, pedagogy and religion. He has also published stories of his travels throughout Asia, where he spent thirty years.
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PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL
In order to build a new low-cost residential complex twenty kilometres to the West of Rome, hundreds of hectares of low-lying hills, orchards, several depopulated hamlets and unplanted vineyards had been cleared by an army of bulldozers, cranes and cheap labour with picks and shovels. In the 1960s, housing construction in Italy had mushroomed out in an erratic, rampaging spectacle beyond any public or private circumspection.
Pier Paolo and his middle-aged mother benefitted from one of these new, but hastily built residential flats on the tenth floor of a fifteen-storey tower. His father had abandoned the family four or five years ago, forcing the boy’s mother to work as a seamstress for the hundreds of residents of their tower. He himself had dropped out of school to work at a nearby wine factory in the industrial zone. Their meagre incomes paid the rent, permitted them to eat two or three meals a day and dress decently.
Everyday, Pier Paolo shuffled lazily to the factory at eight o’clock. To reach the small factory, he crossed an immense horizonless, treeless esplanade paved in the most banal ugly grey paving stones. What caught his attention, however, was a low rising stretch of grassy dirt mounds which ran for a lengthy distance along a high, barbed wire metal barrier which separated the dirt mounds from a rocky embankment leading downwards to a newly build avenue. These low dirt knolls, according to the season, blushed a poppy spring red, a leafy, autumnal brown, a wintry white then a lush, verdant green in the summer. On his off days, he would walk through the low hillocks from one point to the other. They covered an area of about twenty-five metres by ten metres. His constant crossings in this forgotten pile of dirt had traced footpaths in and around the knolls, the low bushes and over broken roots.
Pier Paolo enjoyed these pleasant promenades. Below, on one side, buzzed speeding vehicles. On the other, lay the empty, treeless esplanade where hardly a soul appeared, save a few workers, housewives pushing carts of food, flowers or trinkets to be sold in the neighbourhood market, one or two old school comrades and stray dogs. It was at that particular movement of contemplation that Pier Paolo experienced a tinge of excitement, a mounting commotion that would endorse and embolden his existence, would prompt his escape from the boring walls of a suffocating flat, the ugly concrete and metal of their block residence …
Returning from the factory one afternoon at the beginning of June, Pier Paolo walked briskly over the range of shaggy mounds of piled up dirt for an hour or so before finally deciding upon a spot that would suit his adventure nicely. Hidden from the eyes of those who crossed the esplanade, a small concavity in the rim of a grassy hillock would afford him a place to sleep. He only needed to erect a make-shift lean-to, not to protect him from the rain — during the spring and summer months it never rained — but from the scorching heat. Yes, Pier Paolo resolved to live with nature on this diminutive tract of earth that had miraculously survived the building contractors’ bulldozers and cranes.
He hastened home to his mother who was busy sowing a marriage dress for her second storey neighbour. Pier Paolo excitedly explained his adventure. It would last through not only for the summer months, but also through autumn before the heavy rains set in. She listened passively, her mouth agape. Had her son gone completely daft? No, he appeared quite normal, even serious. He would rise with the rising sun, have his breakfast at the café near the factory, lunch at the factory canteen, and as to diner he would buy deli meats, olives, cheese and bread at the grocer’s.
“Why not eat diner here with me?” his mother suggested in her soft, meek voice.
“Of course I’ll eat with you mummy, but only on weekends. I must live permanently in my new environment. I’m eighteen year’s old, and it will be an adventure to sleep out in such primitive and natural surroundings without neighbours’ screaming and shouting, loud parties until four in the morning, lifts breaking down all the time. I want to breathe fresh air, if that is all possible in this godforsaken dump.”
His mother flushed at these last words, but held her tongue, astonished at her son’s resolution. “You see mummy, I want to look up at the stars and not at the cracks in the ceiling of my room.” His mother nodded her head, thimble on her thumb, needle and thread between her index and middle finger. He was right, there were many cracks and fissures in the ceilings and walls of their ‘new’ flat ! Well, he did show ingenuity and imagination. He wouldn’t take no for an answer, and besides, he wouldn’t be far from home …
So Pier Paolo packed a few belongings in his back-pack, rolled up his sleeping bag, kissed his mother on her wrinkled forehead and strolled to his ‘earthy paradise’ as he facetiously called his up-coming ‘residence’.
The first two weeks Pier Paolo did eat with his mother on Sundays and also gave her his clothes to be washed, cleaned and dried, made ready for work on the morrow. However, the following weekends he did his own washing at the launderette for a few lira, and ate sandwiches at his hilly home instead of with his mother. It certainly was not out of anything against her. He loved her very much. But Pier Paolo wished to be on his very own, especially on his off days and at night, lying on his sleeping bag outside the lean-to, observing the stars and the moon as they moved slowly across the universe. Up till then, no one had disturbed him. A stray dog did sniff about his installation on several occasions, but the animal seemed friendly, and Pier Paolo threw it some slices of salami and pepperoni. The only other ‘visitors’ to his comfortable solitude were the sparrows who gayly pecked at the crumbs of bread that he scattered for them just below his shelter.
Oh how after a hard day’s work at the factory he relished those calm, starry evenings, the light whir of vehicles below beyond the barbed-wire barrier, the absolute silence of the esplanade behind him! He really felt quite at home amongst the natural elements; the ants building their ant-hills, the bees doing their dance amidst the honeysuckles, the birds chirping in and out of the bushes. The poppies and daisies were in bloom, too. Alas, many of the grassy knolls and thorny footways had been littered with coke bottles and caps, beer cans or liquor bottles, yellowed magazine and newspaper pages, cigarette studs, all thrown there by returning workers from the industrial area or gangs of drunken adolescents. Pier Paolo, struggling through the prickly weeds, would clean the mess the best he could, but invariably the same lot or other litter-louts would fling whatever trash they had into his ‘paradise’ as if it were a huge rubbish bin. Did these individuals know that Pier Paolo had taken up residence in those piles of grassy mounds? Even if they did, nothing would have prevented them from tossing whatever they had into it, accompanied by drunken guffaws and mindless giggles.
The sea must not have been far off, or so he imagined. For at times he heard the whir of a winged seagull. He stood to catch sight of it, but only the blurry orange glow of the high rising tower lights far off at the end of the esplanade marked the sky. The towers resembled so many indistinct parapets of flickering light-bulbs which loomed ominously at the end of the soundless esplanade. That vastness of ugly emptiness had always frightened him, and at those times he would turn his back to this sinister, featureless urban landscape and dwell upon the images of faraway scenes that crossed his imagination. No, those electric lights would not chase away his stars …
One star-filled night, he envisaged pink and amber sands of a horizonless desert whose barkans[1] and chots[2] left him breathless; the heat of the sands made him sweat under the blazing hot sun in an azure sky of pure, unpolluted, untainted opal. In another vision, he pictured himself deep in a chain of snow-clad crested mountains, trekking with difficulty over ribbed glaciers and ice-laden passes, the blues of the mountains inviting him to penetrate ever deeper so as to discover the arcane entrance to the subterranean kingdom of the King of the World.
Pier Paolo’s imagination soared to new heights night after night following a hard day’s work. It were as if he had mounted a magic carpet which floated under rainbows, over wide forests and turquoise seas. These fantastic images slid him slowly into a deep, healthy sleep. He awoke refreshed and vigorous, ready for a hearty breakfast at the café and work. In fact, he had never worked as hard as he did now, loading the train cars with heavy cartons of wine, working rapidly at the conveyor belt packaging wine bottles.
Many of the workers admired the young Pier Paolo for his renewed energy, his replenished stamina and spirit. At the sound of the whistle, he showered, bought some prosciutto, pepperoni, provolone, olives, pistachios and bread from the grocer’s, then returned merrily to his shaggy-mounded home. His muscles ached, but gradually relaxed when the stars began to pop out forming clusters of scintillating comfort …
He saw himself on the Niger River somewhere in Mali, drifting in a canoe on the slow moving current, wild geese cackling on the wing, hippopotami bellowing and rumbling in the deep waters, camels grunting from the arid sand-filled shores. He drifted and drifted as the heat bore heavily upon him, lying upon sacks of corn, munching on dates, tomatoes and boiled fish …
A sudden barking! It was the stray dog. Pier Paolo shook himself out of his dreamy stupor, threw the poor scraggy creature a slice of pepperoni, then closed his weary eyes and slept soundly. Darkness crept over the hilly mounds, mantling their denizen in another tranquil night of peaceful repose.
Oddly enough, after having devoured the slice of pepperoni, the dog never returned to visit our grassy-mounded denizen. He had other visitors, however — a motley lot of out-of-schoolers who seemingly scented the presence of someone living amidst the abandoned lot, and who endeavoured to confirm it. It was a Saturday afternoon. Pier Paolo was busy reading an interesting detective story when suddenly he found himself encircled by three ragamuffin boys and two very buxom girls! They all sized him up, noses in the air as if sniffing the warm breeze of a July day.
“Who are you mate?” a skinny boy questioned with overt contempt. He appeared to be the ‘chief’ of the pack. Pier Paolo stood up. He was much taller than any of them and more broad-shouldered. The others held their ground, but one or two scraped the dirt with their worn-out shoes, biting their lips.
“I’m the king of these mounds. What of it?”
“The king?” guffawed the skinny chap out of the corner of his distorted mouth.
“Yea, the king,” repeated Pier Paolo, heightening his voice with an added tinge of condescension.
“Very well, king. Then what if we were to dethrone you and turn your monarchy into a democratic state?” The others sniggered at this show of rhetoric, albeit hesitantly.
“Go ahead, Mister Democrat!” responded the monarch, tightening his fists, smiling through clenched teeth. No one moved. The warm breeze made the democrats sway in their fixed positions like a herd of paper tigers.
“Ah, let it go,” interrupted one of the girls. “Let him rule over his trash-filled kingdom.” And she turned to leave, followed shortly by the other girl then the three boys, who exchanged menacing glances with Pier Paolo. The ‘chief’ bowed in affected reverence to the ‘king’ and mumbled something unintelligible. When they had reached the esplanade, Pier Paolo scoffed at this unexpected intrusion, crawled under his lean-to and went back to his afternoon reading …
The August heat dried all the perfumed poppies and dainty daisies that Pier Paolo had planted around his lean-to. The heat had become unbearable, driving through the palm-leaf roof of his make-shift shelter. It was holiday for most of the workers at the wine factory, but Pier Paolo volunteered to work the whole month, not only for higher wages, but for showering and the afternoon hot meals. He did visit his mom every now and then, but was living mostly on deli meats, olives, cheese, fruit and bread. Because of the heat, he showered every day and took his clothes to the launderette every two days. It’s true that this kind of a diet began to bore him, however, his solitary refuge had really become his royal paradise!
Every Saturday and Sunday, he roamed through his ‘kingdom’ searching the nooks and crannies for unusual objects: a broken tombstone dating from the seventeenth century judging from the Latin inscription, a yellow-paged book of verses by a poet unknown to him, several of which he managed to read but hardly understood. He discovered a rusted compass and magnifying-glass, half-buried in one of the weedy mounds. In a riot of dead roots he rummaged out a photo of a young girl dressed as if to go to church, all in white with a huge black crêpe de chine hat. He collected these treasures and put them in a box for safe-keeping. They represented objects reminiscent of some by-gone era.
One day he stumbled upon a huge footprint, much bigger than any print he had ever seen.
“A dinosaur?” he thought excitedly.
He scoured the knolls for any dinosaur bones but found none. Where did that enormous footprint come from? Pier Paolo grew somewhat apprehensive. His kingdom indeed enclosed a myriad mysteries. And this one drew him further before the advent of humankind …or so he thought.
One fine sunny morning, the black dog he had fed, suddenly appeared with a huge bone in its mouth. Pier Paolo threw it a few slices of salami he had been munching on but the dog shook its shaggy head and plodded off behind a knoll. He raised a quizzical eyebrow. Did the dog not like salami? Perhaps that bone was a dinosaur bone. He shrugged his shoulders sniffing the hot air.
During the month of August he hardly visited his mother. He hardly spoke to his colleagues at the factory. They eyed him nervously. The boy seemed so estranged, aloof with a distant look in his eyes. He would look straight through you and beyond, somewhere far, far away. His gait too had slackened. This being said, he carried out his tasks as usual.
He let his hair grow long, dishevelled. He grew a wispy beard, uncombed. His clothes, although clean, hung on him like a bag, and a bit bedraggled to boot as if he had slept in them. Which he always did, needless to say. All he yearned for was to return to his solitary retreat in the evening, lie down and stare at the emerging stars. They drew him upwards and outwards. The sun having set, the heat ceased to vex him. The crickets discontinued their August chorus. Other sounds, alien, rose to a high pitch in his head…the tinkling of camel bells across the sandy wavelets of the Gobi or the Sahara deserts. There he was again, riding atop a camel, a white, gleaming, silken turban wound about his head, his body protected by a satin djellaba. He had sailed the high seas for many moons before disembarking in this ocean of ergs[3] whose vibrant colours made his eyes squint. The cleanliness of such an expanse delighted him, such a contrast to the concrete ugliness and filth of all those horrid towers! As the ship disappeared over the rim of the watery horizon, he stood between the vastness of the desert and the sea, the first in front of him, the second behind, ready to penetrate unknown territories. Above, a translucent blue sky. The camels plodded onwards; a sudden crispy sound alerted him to a change in the landscape, the camels’ hooves now trudged over stetches of slaty black sands that the dried lava of a volcano eruption had deposited thousands and thousands of years ago. The camels trudged and trudged ; the crusty slaty sands crunched and crunched until Pier Paolo fell asleep …
Pier Paolo, after five weeks of not visiting his mother, spent a Sunday with her. So happy was she to see her son that the cheerful woman cooked him his favourite dish: eggplant parmigiana. She bought him the best provolone and caciocavallocheeses that she could afford, and served him a vintage Chianti wine. As a special treat for dessert, she fried him Sicilian sfince[4]. How he wolfed those delicious delicacies down! Pier Paolo hadn’t eaten such sweets for over three months. He had become so thin, his long hair and beard framed an emaciated face, whose bulging eyes bore a wild look. Yet he remained very polite, mild-mannered, even tender towards his loving mother throughout the afternoon. When he closed the door behind him, she held back her tears. Would she hold them back when his final hour came?
It was a warm September afternoon, 1975. Next to his lean-to, Pier Paolo sat reading a novel by Alberto Moravia, ‘GliIndifferenti’[5], the 1929 edition. He sniffed the cool autumn air, admired the pleasant scents of the poppies and honeysuckles around which the bees were busily buzzing. From behind the mounds, he heard a few vehicles screech to a halt, followed by many coarse voices. The boy stood, walked over the mounds and noticed five or six men in ties and two policemen staring up at him. A big fat man, probably a building contractor by the look of his clothes, waved to him to come down. With overt disdain, he turned and returned to his novel. Shortly after, though, he found himself surrounded by these intruders to his privacy. He stood, miffed to the marrow!
“You’re trespassing, sirs. And encroaching on my afternoon reading.” This was stated with calm but obvious scorn. All the men laughed so loud that it brought a series of yowls from the stray dog, who had been observing the scene from atop the knoll where Pier Paolo had built his lean-to. It was showing its teeth, yet uttered not a growl.
“Clear out boy, you’ve had your fun for the summer. The neighbours are complaining about you. Anyway the city is about to level all this and pave it clean.” The fat man certainly gave himself airs, puffing out his chest.
Pier Paolo, with a thin smile, replied wearily: “What neighbours? No neighbour has ever said anything about my being here. They don’t even know I’m here.”
“Listen, don’t muck about with us. I’m telling you to push off or we’ll be forced to drag you off,” the other said in a offensive tone, his face turning a beet-red.
Pier Paolo clenched his fists: “This is my kingdom, fatty. I and only I decide when to leave!”
The dog yowled again. The fat contractor kicked down the lean-to in a spate of anger. Pier Paolo, taken aback by this display of uncalled for violence, lashed out at him with two or three well-placed blows to the face. ‘Fatty’ fell backwards to the ground, spitting out a tooth and much blood.
One of the policemen grasped Pier Paolo by the shoulder ; the young boy showing unusual strength knocked his arm away and struck the policeman’s jaw with his elbow, then continued to strike him in the ribs with a volley of punches. Just then from above, the dog leapt into the crowd barking hysterically. It fell onto one of the men biting into the neck. The dog had gone mad. The other policeman took out his pistol and shot it dead.
Pier Paolo, stunned by the gunshot and the dog lying limp next to his broken lean-to, flew into a rage and attacked the policeman, seething like an animal, gnashing his teeth. He struck blow after blow, uncontrollably. Now the rest of the men pounced on the boy beating him mercilessly to the ground, kicking him in the head. The policeman broke up the beating, handcuffed the half-unconscious Pier Paolo and dragged him off to the police car …
The badly beaten boy was taken to hospital. Upon his release, he was immediately arrested and charged for assault and battery on the two policemen and on two municipal civil servants. At the trial the accused, who had no defence, was sentenced to two years imprisonment and a 50.000 lira fine, which he refused to pay on the grounds that neither he nor his mother could afford such a sum. The judge slapped on another year of imprisonment.
Confined to stare at four concrete walls many hours a day, Pier Paolo gradually slipped out of the reality of his circumstances. He took no food nor spoke to anyone. He merely lay prostrate on his little cell bed like one awaiting death. No more wonderful images of deserts, mountains and seas crossed his benumbed mind.
Death stole upon Pier Paolo in violent spasms on the evening of the second of November, 1975. Apparently, he had starved himself to death.
His lonely mother sewed and sewed, no longer able to retain her tears. No neighbour came to comfort her; no religious authority to commiserate with her grief.
As to Pier Paolo’s kingdom or paradise, on one dreary November day, several bulldozers levelled the shaggy mounds. The area that had been his home now became an extension of the paved esplanade up to the barrier of the embankment.
[4] Made of ricotta, unbleached flour and unsalted butter, rolled into balls and fried. When cooled, sugar powder is sprinkled on them. They are generally eaten on Saint Joseph’s day in Sicily.
[5] Translated in English as ‘The Indifferent Ones’ or ‘The Time of Indifference’ by Alberto Moravia(1907-1990)
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Paul Mirabile is a retired professor of philology now living in France. He has published mostly academic works centred on philology, history, pedagogy and religion. He has also published stories of his travels throughout Asia, where he spent thirty years.
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PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL
Tommy sat down to dinner with his parents. Roast beef and mash again. He grimaced. His mother, a cashier at Lidl[1], and his father, a travelling salesman, threw him cursory looks: “Tommy, you should eat, meat is so dear,” his mother lamented.
“Eat up boy, money doesn’t grow on trees you know,” barked his father, wheezing irritably, followed by a huff that brooked no further comment on the subject.
Tommy slouched over his plate and wolfed down the food without a word. He left the table, as always, casting a contrary glance at his father, who ate his meal in silence, a ritual to which he demanded both his wife and his son to observe scrupulously.
Tommy slipped outside into the warm breeze of late summer, sitting down on the steps of his parents’ (the bank’s!) town council flat. How his father unnerved him with his tyrannical rules and stentorian ditties. “He’s gone almost half the year selling his cheap, nasty wares, and here he is laying down the law like a bloody dictator. Poor mommy does all she can to meet his inept demands, but when she can’t she cries her eyes out,” he fumed inwardly, clenching his fists.
Tommy took out a box of matches, lighting each one, then flicking them into the yellowing grass of their front garden. He enjoyed watching the little sticks sail into the night air all alit, only to fall extinguished on the stone walk-way or grass. He loved the sulphurous smell of the sparks, the vision of the orange flame. They aroused a shiver of excitement in his belly and spine. The door opened. His father snorted: “Whatever are you doing with all those matches ? Matches don’t grow on trees.” And in a heightened voice, “Stop wasting them …” He slammed the door shut. Tommy clenched his fists, his lips whitening in constrained animosity …
Tommy began his incendiary career at school. Armed with a box of matches that he had pinched from the local grocers, he set fire to the large rubbish bin in one of the maintenance rooms on the first floor of the building, causing billows of smoke to fill corridors and lungs of children and teachers as they rushed about either to escape or extinguish it. The fire was not serious in itself. However, the bin contained plastic substances whose horrible odours and ochre-yellow fumes made everyone retch or choke. Several children collapsed from smoke inhalation. Since no one had suspected Tommy, or any other child for that matter, the school board of directors concluded that it was due to an act of negligence. Hence, the elderly maintenance man was promptly sacked!
The thirteen-year old Tommy’s maiden exploit filled his lungs with pride, and would incite him to bigger deeds of daring …
And bigger deeds they indeed were: Southwold’s supermarket fell prey to Tommy’s insatiable fiery appetite. He had spotted an area outside the supermarket where hundreds and hundreds of wooden boxes, crates and cartons had been stacked all along the wall. This storage area was fenced off from a vacant lot which ran the whole length of it. In full daylight, the defiant Tommy sprinkled gasoline all along the mass spread of boxes, crates and cartons, then tossed matches into them. He ran and lay low under the scant bushes of the lot as the fire took hold and spread. Soon the flames were licking the wall, arching high over the roof of the supermarket (it wasn’t Lidl where his mother worked!), casting sparks into the hot, August air.
Tommy crawled away to safety into a nearby woods where he observed the now roaring flames with gratifying glee. Sirens drowned out the shrills of clients and supermarket personnel. The young arsonist dusted himself off, pushed back his tousled hair, and like all seasoned arsonists have done (and will always do), stepped gingerly into the gathering crowd that watched the fiery spectacle, listening to them conjecture unintelligently on the origins of the fire. He covered his mouth, concealing a victorious smile, mesmerised by the grandeur of the blaze. The thirteen-year-old Tommy eyed the spectators with disdain, his shrewd mind already kindling his next performance for all to see — one that would ‘bring down the house’, as his father would always jeer with that gross guffawing of his.
In that nearby woods which separated the shopping mall and the school from Tommy’s neighbourhood, a gang of ruffians had built a huge tree-fort in an aged oak, whose horizontal growth provided an excellent setting for their fort. It was very long, sloping upwards into the large leafy branches, built with brand new wood stolen from the construction sites and roofed with a huge metal sign that the rowdies, no doubt, had pilfered from some warehouse. The fort was furnished with stolen furniture, pieces of carpet, framed pictures, curtains and all sorts of knick-knacks. Tommy despised this gang of thugs who constantly stopped him on his way to school on the wide path that divided the woods in two, either to filch his lunch money, which they deemed ‘toll fee’ for passage through ‘their territory’, or simply to slap him about a bit ‘just for fun’. Tommy could have gone around the woods, but that would have implied a forty-five minute trek. Class began at eight.
Tommy’s heart, aflame by these extorting blighters, especially by their crass, vulgar laughter, carried out his revenge with ardent savagery and meticulous precision …
Four days later, at five o’clock in the afternoon, gigantic flames spearing upwards from the clearing of the woods were seen miles away. Even the heat was felt in the nearby neighbourhoods. Indeed, Tommy had thought out his plan of action with methodical mania. He knew when the wretched hooligans would be out of their lair of lechery, all eleven of them, out on ‘errands’ as they snickered; that is, stealing, extorting, fighting. He spread two small jerrycans of gasoline, siphoned from his father’s car, thick over the tree-fort, trunk and branches of the oak. He felt a pang of sorrow for the aged oak … but what must be done must be done, right ? When these preliminaries had been accomplished the rest was child’s play. The dryness of the tree and the wood of the fort produced a conflagration that even took Tommy by surprise, all the more as it spread at an incredible speed out of the clearing into the surrounding wooded areas. Alarmed but fascinated by the raging, arching, yellowish-orange flames, he threw more and more brushwood into the sweeping blaze, screaming at the top of his lungs – “Feed the fire! Feed the fire! Feed the fire!” But this unexpected madness nearly cost him dearly, for at that very hysterical moment, one of the ruffians who had probably seen the flames from afar on his way back to the tree-fort, overheard Tommy’s uncontrollable cries and spotted the arsonist on the edge of the clearing, flinging dead wood into the flying sparks that shot out from all quarters of the main blaze.
“Hey you!” the lad shouted. Tommy didn’t need to turn around. He recognised the voice. He took to his heels through the twisting paths of the woods which had not as yet been touched by the lapping flames, running as fast as he could. He heard the other pacing after him, yelling at the top of his voice words that struck fear in Tommy’s little heart. But Tommy knew the woods like his hand. He veered off the path and darted into a pocket of thick thorny undergrowth, his face and hands pricked and slashed. The pursuing lad stopped, out of breath, hesitant to follow, for now the unfurling blazes were curling up in front him! Knowing that the criminal had escaped, he back-tracked, hoping to escape. He did, for the morning newspapers reported no deaths from the tragic incident. As to the arsonist, he battled through thorn and thicket, managing to flee by way of a tiny footway which led him behind his neighbourhood. He waited in a copse of willows and, under the cover of darkness, made for his parents’ flat, looking furtively at the rising flames, which by then had all but devoured the woodlands. At ten o’clock he reached his doorstep, seen by no one …
Sirens screamed well into the night, accompanied by the coarse calls of clusters of men, apparently out in search for the culprit.
Tommy, exhausted by the fire and his flight, silently opened the front door, slid in and tip-toed upstairs to wash his face and hands, smelling of smoke and streaked with dried blood from the thorns. Once this operation completed, he stepped outside, then stood on the steps of the flat, watching the crimson glow of the conflagration light up the sky. Many neighbours were doing the same, some standing and talking in the middle of the high street. His father and mother stepped outside to watch the spectacle.
“How awful! How terribly awful!” wailed his mother, hands cupped over her mouth.
“I hope they catch the animal and skin him alive!” his father yelped in a burst of his usual condemnatory judgement. “I’ll be the first to lend a helping hand,” he added in a angry voice, spitting out a cigarette stub into the garden flower-bed. Tommy listened, a slight grin spreading over his aching face.
“Tommy, what are you doing here on the steps at this hour?” his mother suddenly enquired rather nervously, as if she had just emerged from some trance.
“I’m doing what you and everyone else in the neighbourhood are doing, mommy, watching the fire.” This pertinent answer prompted no reply.
The next morning at breakfast, Tommy explained away the scratches on his face and hands because of their cat, whose viciousness was quite known to them all if caressed the wrong way.
“Please don’t muck about with the cat, dear,” his mother lovingly reprimanded. “Look at your face and hands.” Tommy shrugged his shoulders at this show of motherly concern, thanking his stars that his father was out early that morning at some sales show in connivance with his associates to fleece their clients. His mother harped on about the woodland fire and all the rumours and gossip that conflated it. Tommy hardly listened.
The three devastating fires that broke out in the wheat and rye fields and in the orchards of the neighbouring villages and hamlets west of Southwold during September convinced the police that they were not dealing with some feckless firebug, but a shrewd and odious serial compulsive pyromaniac. And since there had been no rain for months, the fields and orchards went up like ‘a box of matches’ as the expression goes. And yet, not one single shred of evidence could be brought against him (or her?). No one had seen anyone near the fires, nor had that ‘anyone’ left a clue of his or her identity by inadvertence. The adolescent who had pursued Tommy in the woods, when interrogated by the police, admitted that because of the smoke and the hood over the fugitive’s head he could not give any clear portrait of the heathen.
Meanwhile, vigilante squads had been formed to track down and ferret out the beast, corner him (or her?) in his or her lair or den …
Tommy read or heard all these trumpetings with considerable apathy, working hard at school, keeping to himself, playing the shy, reserved boy during recreation or when out with a friend or two. His conscious was clear … his keen sense of survival, too. How he jeered inwardly at all this fuss over him: Little Tommy Harper, the pyromaniac! It did indeed hoist his pride. His mother and father talked unceasingly about the misbegotten pyromaniac at dinner night after night, his father booming out his usual commonplace clichés, his mother, those exasperating soughs and sighs. As to Tommy, he remained silent, meditating on the fact that his father had suspended his sacred ritual of silence at the table — at least for this major event– but more importantly, mulled over his next exploit, one that would go down in the chronicles of their precious sea-side town. What Tommy did not know, and this goes without saying, that this chronicled exploit –for indeed it was chronicled– would be his last …
The origin of the daring deed lay in an ugly tussle between Tommy and one of his classmates over a boat-outing at the boy’s father’s boat some five miles or so from Southwold on the River Blyth. It seems that the boy’s father, for some unknown reason, had taken a disliking to Tommy’s father, a dislike which then tainted Tommy. When the classmate invited several mates on his father’s catamaran one Saturday morning, Tommy was overtly excluded. He demanded an explanation for this unfair ostracism. He was given none! The boy merely smiled in unconcealed contempt. Tommy, fists clenched, knocked him down and began pummelling him with vicious blows until two or three teachers came to the battered boy’s rescue. The incident occurred during recreation and created quite a stir at school.
Tommy was, henceforth, not only shunned by his fellow mates, but was suspended from school for three days. His father in a spurt of terrible wrath, took the belt to him, beating him so hard that the boy’s mother had to intervene to avoid her son from fainting: “I’ll have no blood in this house ! No blood!” she raged and ranted, putting an end to the thrashing. The red-faced father pushed his son to the floor and marched out of the house …
A week later Tommy had thoroughly refined his plan. Nothing would curb his revenge. How sweet it would be… He would reduce that boat to cinders! Everything up in crisp, crimson flames! Everything: yachts, catamarans, the boat-house and club. Everything! That’ll teach them all what it means to be humiliated, banned like an outlaw. “Fire for fire! Feed the fire! Feed the fire! Feed the fire!” he repeated to himself raving.
On one very warm night, at the beginning of October, Tommy slipped out of the flat at midnight. His father had gone off on one of his ‘travelling tours’ and his mother was fast asleep. He dressed all in black, a hood hid his blond hair. As always, he had three jerrycans of gasoline stuffed in a backpack, siphoned from a neighbour’s car, along with two or three large boxes of matches and his father’s pruning shears.
The walk to the waterfront took him over three hours, but the effort would be worth its weight in gold. He had studied the area inside and out, had even drawn a map of it. The pruning shears got him into the enclosure. From there, the rest would be easy. First targets: the boat-house and club. He saturated their walls with enough siphoned gasoline to ignite the Tower of London. Then to the yachts and catamarans he skipped gayly, the berthed vessels dancing lightly in their slips[2]. Yachts, motor boats and catamarans were soaked with what was left of the gasoline, Tommy jumping from one to the other in a state of uncontrolled dementia. Above him, a full moon girt with a golden halo seemed to fuel fire to the leaping lunatic, giggling and choking with laughter at each wild hurl of gasoline: “Feed the fire! Feed the fire! Feed the fire!” he howled into the darkened air …
Suddenly hurried footsteps! A torch carved out a hollow tunnel of hazy light in his direction. No time to lose; it was the watchman on to him. He had not counted on that. He lit several matches, igniting boat after boat. The torchlight swung from left to right, the footsteps hurried here and there as flames burst into the blackness. From the boats Tommy then jumped onto the floating dock, hurrying to the boat-house and once there threw matches randomly at the saturated walls. A curtain of flames shot up, spiralling speedily towards the rooftop. The whole house went up like a rocket ship out of its launch. Two small explosions followed.
“There must have been demijohns of gas inside,” Tommy thought. As he raced to the marina club-house to complete his crazed ravaging two or three gunshots rang out, one of which ricocheted metallically off a crane just to the left of him next to a boat ramp. “He’s shooting at me the bloody git!” Tommy lashed out, scowling. He ran and cringed for cover behind stacks of buoys and coils of rope. The marina club-house still lay several feet to his right, but here the desperate arsonist hesitated. He had no cover to reach it, and worse still, because of the dark and the spiralling smoke he couldn’t see the watchman. Could the bugger see him? Tommy had never been confronted by such a perilous predicament. Escaping from pursuing ruffians was one thing but dodging bullets was another. This was no police or action picture. Tommy realised that one bullet could put an end to his life in a split second.
Tommy baulked at the idea of running to that awaiting target, but completely obsessed with it, he was about to take the risk. However, something unexpected happened. Unknowingly he had hid behind the buoys and coils of rope that had been piled up on a pontoon moored to one of the many floating docks on the river waters. The ropes that moored the pontoon to the dock had been burnt away by the flames racing out of the marina boat-house, flames that had all of a sudden surrounded Tommy. About to dash towards the boat-club to escape the approaching flames, he realised that the pontoon was moving out into the river, slowly. The River Blyth that led out to the Broads … then to the ocean! A few more shots rang out in his direction. He caught sight of the watchman, it was good Mister Knowles, the father of one of his classmates. The man, well over his fifties stumbled then fell, lying still as the flames seemed to engulf his body. Tommy screamed in despair. An arsonist he indeed was… but a murderer ?
Sirens rang out in the heat of this dreadful night. Firemen and police had since entered the marina battling through the blazes and stifling smoke with tons of water sprayed at random. Had they seen Mister Knowles body? Would they be able to save him?
Torchlights swept the marina then swerved into the river. Hidden securely behind the buoys and rope the cringing boy could not be seen, yet the police were training their torches on it as if suspecting something. “They’ll get the rubber boats out after me,” Tommy fretted. “I’m done for !” As his father had said, they would skin him alive! Already the lynching squads were out in the nearby streets, tracking the heathen who had struck again. And those blokes were no choir boys.
The pontoon moved quicker and quicker towards the Broads where the fierce swells tossed and rocked the fragile vessel. Tommy thought of putting on a buoy but he couldn’t swim, and anyway the vigilantes would be scouring the marshes along the river in search of the fugitive; he could hardly stay in the water, floating about like a cork in a pond or an apple bobbing up and down in a barrel. Thick grey, fleecy clouds slid athwart the halo of the moon. Tommy was suddenly swallowed up in a shroud of gloom as the pontoon bounded out beyond the Broads into the rising rolls and swells. The thirteen-year old Tommy Harper screamed for his mommy. A scream that no ear heard!
Further and further out the doomed passenger, stranded on the pontoon, was borne into the darkness and distance …
*
After months and months of searching for the pontoon, the naval patrols and the local police abandoned their hunt. All that they were able to find were two or three floating buoys. As to the sudden disappearance of thirteen-year old Tommy Harper, it was said that he had absconded from home. Oddly enough, the police never suspected the boy of the fires, believing his disappearance, and the end of the series of tragic conflagrations, a mere coincidence. Furthermore, the only person to have had a clear view of the criminal, Mr Knowles, had unfortunately died of smoke inhalation, the firemen arriving too late to resuscitate him. When neighbours of dubious doubts questioned Mrs Harper about this ‘coincidence’ over a cup of tea at bridge she would reply in lachrymose accents, wringing her knotty hands: “Why would my Tommy ever do that ?”
One or two neighbours of the Harpers believed that they had caught sight of a boy who bore a remarkable resemblance to their son in Amsterdam, walking up and down the streets, handing out leaflets. This information, however, was never investigated. Besides, Mr Harper, ravaged by all this gossip and hearsay about his son threw up his hands and declared :
“I’ve washed my hands of that boy. Let him go to the devil!”{ His poor mother on the other hand, cried and cried every day and night, praying that her only son, her little Tommy, would cheerfully come walking through their front door …
He never did.
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[1] A German founded discount supermarket chain located in many European countries
Paul Mirabile is a retired professor of philology now living in France. He has published mostly academic works centred on philology, history, pedagogy and religion. He has also published stories of his travels throughout Asia, where he spent thirty years.
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PLEASE NOTE: ARTICLES CAN ONLY BE REPRODUCED IN OTHER SITES WITH DUE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT TO BORDERLESS JOURNAL
Ever since his boyish days at the Seminary in Zamora, Spain, Felipe Jimenez acquired an unsual passion for mediaeval Visigothic architecture. A passion rarely shown in the mid 1800s. Another passion, too, swelled Felip’s heart and pride, one seemingly incongruous to the first: his fascination for the Quinta del Sordo, or the Villa of the Deaf; the villa or country-house where Francisco de Goya[1], a famed painter, alone and dwelling in his soundless world, drove out the fears and torments that haunted his sleepless nights by depicting a series of the most incredible frescoes that any painter up till then had painted. Frescoes that came to be called ‘pinturas negras‘[2]. Why Felipe Jimenez had associated these two passions into one maniacal life project is the drama of his heart and of this tale …
In the mid 1800s the only means of exploring the Spanish countryside with any speed was on horseback. Felipe prided himself as an excellent horseman. He loved horses, especially his own, whom he named with endearing irony, Rocinante[3]. As he roamed Northern Spain in search of the three extant Visigothic churches, he himself questioned his love of mediaeval art: Was it his voracious readings of mediaeval castles and knights? The glorious battles between Visigoth Christians and Muslim Arabs? The silent stones of ruined churches, castles and hamlets to whose voices no one wished to lend an ear?
And Goya’s frescoes? The deaf Master’s tortured figures and thickly layered pigments impressed on the solitary walls might have reflected the bleak, lonely landscape that Felipe was now traversing speedily. Reflected the bleakness, too, of his soul for a reason that he could not understand. He thought, spurring his steed faster, that the oddity of his passions might have been kindled, unknowingly, by the unexpected encounter of two very apparently contradictory visions, yet out of which Felipe had been magically touched or enlightened because of their estranged association, because of their incompatible commonalities.
With a genuine thirst to sate these emotions, our rider rode on and on until he came upon the seventh century Visigothic church of San Pedro de la Nave in his own region of Zamora. A pure joy to lit up his eyes when he saw the sculptured capitals[4] of twittering birds and intoxicating flowers, of the beloved Daniel in the Lion’s den, soothing the roaring beasts with his melodious chanting, of Saint Philip’s outstretched hands conducting his chant to Creation. These tickled Felipe’s ears as he listened to their concerted canticle. He had never before experienced such fineness of hewn stone and arched forms.
From his shoulder-bag he procured a sketchbook and began drawing the animated capitals, one after the other, carefully noting each cry of the bird, each chant of Daniel and of Philip. When this task had been meticulously completed, he stepped outside into the blackness of night, breathed in the thick air, then retrieved his bed-roll, rolled it out and slept peacefully against the outer wall of the church, whose stones, still hot from the scorching afternoon sun, afforded him warmth against the chills of the early autumnal night. He awoke refreshed, bathed in the swathes of a pure, reddish, morning glow.
Now if these treasures aroused enthusiasm in Felipe’s heart, greater would be the treasure trove that awaited him to the south of the great city of Burgos, when some weeks later, he discovered the seventh century chapel of Quintanilla de las Viñas, perfectly intact. Dismounting from his trusty but fatigued steed, in awe he admired the outer friezes[5] of exquisitely sculptured partridges and peacocks, feasted his dust-filled eyes upon festoons of interweaving vines and clusters of hanging grapes. They were almost real to the touch those plump clusters! He listened in a sort of dazed ecstasy to the imagined screams of the partridges and peacocks as they paraded their plumage and fanned their tails inside the frieze. The sweetness of the grapes dripped off each pregnant cluster. How Felipe longed to quench his thirst by picking each one out of its stony bezel.
Unable to enter the chapel, the door being barred, Felipe brought out his sketchbook and reproduced those screams and sweet drippings as best as his artistic talents enabled him. He was an excellent artist. As he closed his sketchbook, a sudden thrill shot up his spine — a thrill that he had never experienced before. Felipe rode off filled with wonder, the early autumnal sun setting red and round over the arid plains of northern Spain. Had it all been an intimate communion with those birds and grapes? Had others bore witness to those storied stones? Felipe patted Rocinante’s jowls affectionately: all these questions remained enshrouded in the mystery of Spain … his own story within Spain’s …
Over the scorching plains Felipe galloped wildly in search of the last Visigothic church, San Juan deBaños, locatedin the region of Palencia. He arrived after five or six days of riding under the blazing sun, sleeping under the gelid stars.
This jewel outshone the other two: the basilica-plan church’s naves[6] were supported by the most perfectly intact groined vaults[7]: they left him breathless. He began sketching them in feverish excitement. But what really astounded the drawer was the triumphal arch that welcomed the church-goer within. An arch that he had never laid eyes on before.
Just then Rocinante began pawing the hard soil with the hoof of her foot. She snorted and pawed with steady blows in an unusual way. Felipe ran over to her. He noted that her horse-shoe had been displaced. As he bent to reshoe his horse, it occurred to him that Rocinante’s iron shoe bore an exact resemblance to the welcoming entry arch of the church. When he had finished the shoeing, he resumed his drawing, marking every detail of this incredible arch: It can’t be compared to the Moorish arch or to the Roman one- he mused. He then decided to coin this novelty the arco de herradura[8]; that is, the horse-shoe arch, for indeed unlike all the arches found in Spain, the opening at the bottom of this one was much narrower than its full span. But what attracted him most about this original work of art were the two abutting ends of the arches supported by the tops of the columns which gave the impression that they sought to join together to form a circle. Of course this impression was one of an artist’s …
Overjoyed by his coined expression, thanks to his trusty dark-maned Rocinante whose shoe had been properly shod, Felipe spent the rest of the day studying the church inside and out. When twilight set in he pulled out his bed-roll, lay down at the apse[9] of San Juan de Baños, imagining in his head his next and last halt, Recaredopolis, the only Visigothic town to be founded by the migrating Northern-Germanic peoples, built by King Leovigilda’s excellent craftsmen in 578 and finished by his son, King Recaredo, the first Catholic Visigothic king of Spain, baptised in 586. According to his map, Recaredopolis was located eighty kilometres from Madrid in a hamlet called Zorita de las Canes. According to several learned acquaintances, he had been informed that the hamlet lay in stoic silence, ignored by archeologists, unvisited by the curious. He liked that. He would ride to it at the red of dawn …
Five days later, the dark-maned Rocinante carried her exhausted rider, face-blistered and throat-swollen into Zorita de las Canas, then straight to Recaredopolis. Here the silence of the still standing stones welcomed the quester. Trotting through the remaining edifices he pulled up his steed before a horse-shoe arch, more or less identical to the one that he had admired and sketched at San Juan de Baños. The domed roofs of the churches and chapels had fallen into decay, but the untouched stones rang of a superior, magnanimous craftsmanship. This sixth century town had withstood the upheavels of History, the turbulence of Time, although the two-storey palace had lost its second storey entirely and the granary had been reduced to two walls and piles of heaped up stone.
The horseshoe arch at Recaredopolis. Photo Courtesy: Paul Mirabile
Felipe let his horse roam about looking for a good feed whilst he meandered in and out of the moss-clad walls of the dilapadated palace, granary and sanctuary, filling his sketchbook with copy after copy of this fabulous mediaeval architectural trove. It seemed to him that no one, besides the villagers, had stepped foot in these ruins. Felipe felt estranged from himself, staggering about in a queer trance-like state from wall to wall, all so silent, yet deafening to his ears, so lyrical, so ecstatic that they strove to enter into communion with him. He sketched until the advent of night …
The ever-standing mediaeval sanctuary walls. Photo Courtesy: Paul Mirabile
Felipe built a fire and cooked a few potatoes and green peppers over it on a make-shift spittle. Lying on his bed-roll as he had done for so many star-studded nights, hands behind his head, he scrutinized the Autumn moon’s face mottled with huge black spots, listening to the deep, warm silence that surrounded him. He suddenly sat up: Had he not heard a runeful moaning skipping over the dry, empty plains? He bit his lower lip. The night air began to chill him. He continued to listen, attentively, his heart pounding painfully. Nothing. No one. Something frightened him: The horrors of war. Of famine and poverty ? Of old age creeping up upon him ? Or the ugliness of human depravity ? But why are these thoughts plaguing him at this very uninvited moment, as he lay so peaceful in this lieu of broken stones and tales ?
The sanctuary rising over the dry, grass-swept plain. Photo Courtesy: Paul Mirabile
He counted the stars, mentally tracing the curved contours of the waxing alabaster moon. Nothing stirred. No breath of wind, no call or cry from animal or bird. Felipe felt a surge of loneliness here as if the slow decay and negligence of the ruins resembled his own, physically and mentally … He was well over fifty, and the hardships of aging were slowly creeping up on him. His hand trembled when he drew. His back hurt from riding. His mind thought thoughtless thoughts, adrift between the past and the present in some sort of dark chaos.
Felipe ignored the fact that no thought arises by thinking. Thoughts burst upon you at the most unsuspecting moments. They dance and whirl about then penetrate as quickly as that! The thinker must welcome them no matter how abrupt, unforeseen, painful. Yet, Felipe was keen on welcoming them, eager to decipher their subtle choreography.
He awoke in a dull trance. The sun rose lethargically over the voiceless ruins, the curling, misty plains. He watched its entrance into the world whilst the dancing thoughts that had spun him about during the night, and at present were jarring him out of sleep, grew brighter and brighter into figures of acts to be enacted. He threw dirt over the embers of the fire, rolled up his rug, saddled the munching Rocinante, and with a last glimpse of Visigoth Spain, galloped at full speed towards Madrid.
However, not to the big city. What had he to do with big cities ? No, Felipe Jimenez spurred desperately to Manzanares, twenty kilometres outside of Madrid, where there, the enigma of his quest would be resolved, or so he hoped! For a wild, dancing thought had overwhelmed him last night. A thought so feral that it would surely unlock the door to the mystery of an overt sense of hopelessness. Felipe imagined that hidden recess, heard its muffled invocations. To Manzanares he thus rode hard. To the Quinta del Sordo (Villa of the Deaf) where those welled up voices would overflow and spill forth the truth of centuries and centuries of silent exuberance, ecstasy and crime … To him and him alone ? That sacred communion remained to be seen …
Francisco de Goya’s voice, one that the great painter no longer heard since his deafness had severed him from the rest of the world, lay dorment in that villa; or so it was said. The great Master heard only faint murmurs of the Other World, murmurs that conducted his hand, steered his strokes, governed his unbridled imagination.
To those strange frescoes Felipe flew, thrilled that the hidden recesses of somber existence would be laid bare at that villa, illumined by the fourteen pinturas negras (black paintings), those black, ochre and brown pigments telling a tale that no historian, no archaeologist, no artist has ever told. Muteness, deafness, voicelessness — beacons of existential raison d’être …
Three days later, Felipe Jimenez and Rocinante arrived at the villa as wreaths of fog were lifting off the slow, rolling wavelets of the River Manzanares. He dismounted, tied his horse to a tree and stood for several minutes in front of a quaint, two-storey country house behind which rose a range of shaggy hillocks hardly visible in the morning haze. Between the wisps of mist he noted that the front walls were in a deplorable state, suffering no doubt from the humidity and heavy rains. The alabaster sheen of the roughcast had crumbled off in large, mossy patches into a front garden overgrown with yellowing quitch grass, spiky thistles and thorny nettles. Flower beds had become weedy, rank.
He walked up to the front door and knocked: once … twice … thrice: No one.
Felipe laughed and thought: “Of course, he can’t hear. He’s deaf !” Mustering a bit of courage, he pushed open the heavy door; it had been left unbarred. He peeked inside, then slipped in quietly. Once inside, the silence frightened him. All the shutters had been shut in the dining room. There was hardly any furniture. A foul odour of dissolution made him dizzy.
“Señor … Señor Goya?” Felipe called in a feeble voice unlike his own, the echo filling the room and his ears with unfamiliarity. “Are you out ? Yes, you must be out!” he assured himself, after which he rapidly threw open the shutters allowing streams of greyish, morning, misty light into the Master painter’s dining room. He gasped in disbelief. Painted on the dirty, unpapered walls were six frescoes that glowered at him in irate mockery. Yes, they eyed this intruder, this interloper’s every gesture with incensed scorn: there, the toothless guffawing of two old men hunched over their bowls slurping soup, fleshless faces sneering in gnarled lechery. Whether it was the dull light or the artistic acuteness of Goya’s brush work, their faces gave the impression of being embossed with warts or malignant tumours. Their clothes drooped on them like tattered rags (Dos viejos comiendo sopa)[10] !
Then Felipe approached a most peculiar scene: the mythological god of Time, Saturn, its eyes popping out of its sockets, was chewing one of his sons alive in bloody gluttony, the ruthless, long-haired creature believing that if he devoured his sons, one by one, he would never be dethroned by them, thus interrupting the course of Time (Saturno devorando uno de sus hijos)[11]. To his left, the most frightening of all frescoes: El Aquelarre[12]. Felipe drew closer. Yes, this was the Master’s most horrid depiction of his mindset: a black mass! It was a huge depiction of a motley crew, attired in tatters, gloating, mottled faces tormented, distorted by unhealthy beliefs, listening in starry-eyed reverence to a goat-like creature, yes, Satan himself, robed in black, horns held high in haughty hallowedness. Upon these dank, lonely walls Goya expunged from his tortured mind the two pillars of his psyche: the ecstatic and the grotesque …
In a state of feverish agitation Felipe took out his sketchbook and traced the six frescoes one after the other like a madman attempting to capture each frightful feature, every desperate detail, each and every harrowing stroke of the Master’s demoniacal brush.
Sketching as best he could, given the dusky dimness of the late morning light and the dark pigments of the paintings, Felipe, after having drawn the downstairs frescoes now rushed head-long upstairs to Goya’s study. He shrank back in a dazed shock overwhelmed by the sight of the other eight masterpieces. All of them depicted the dark recesses of a man’s deranged mind, a mind enmeshed in darkened recesses, questioning and questioning and questioning. Felipe went from one to the other gaping at the cheerless existence of an artist, whilst the artist’s cheerless figures gaped at him, at this unwelcomed stranger. With much difficulty he discerned two warty, bizarre figures suspended dreamily in mid-air as if set free from Earth’s weightiness, sailing over a battlefield where they observed the drama below in ecstatic grotesqueness. In the background upon a hill an embattled castle lent a glum foreboding to the outcome of the scene (Visión fantástica)[13]. And there, on the back wall, two men, buried up to their knees, battling to the death with cudgels, a delightful technique that only the Spaniards could have invented. (Duelo a garrotazos)[14].
“Hobgoblins, all of them!” Felipe cried out involuntarily in crazed delirium. He had lost control of himself, sketching and sketching the figures that glowered at him, talking aloud in an effort to expurgate the evil that gradually filled his soul. The horrors of war, death, violence.
The most phantasmagorical visions had been assembled here in this dreadful villa during the restless nights of a his heart, painted by the Master of painters who had shunned all contact with the outside world. A solitary, mute communion had occurred within these demented walls, whose commerce wallowed in the mire of old age decrepitude, of sickening lust for glorious butcheries and triumphant slaughtering. Did Francisco de Goya love the smell of blood?
Felipe hardly understood the obsession that had nettled him for so many years whilst he sketched until his wrist ached. The mute stones … the deaf ears … the pounding silence that had entombed the landscape with courtly crimes, pogroms and despot debaucheries, all of which had crumbled into speechless stone, into hollow, unspoken edifices. Indeed, all had fallen into decay, a slow decay, like the colourless figures painted on these waning walls ; like Goya’s mind ! “And mine ? Yes, mine too ! Ecstasy and grotesqueness : the mindset of our national character …” he acknowledged ingloriously.
Felipe, utterly exhausted, completed his sketching just before nightfall. He tip-toed down the stairway to the front door that he had left ajar. A last glimpse behind him saddened his heart; he had not met the Master. Yet, at the same time, a faint voice told him it would have been a fruitless meeting: the deaf have no one but themselves to converse with.
Furthermore, perhaps that meeting would have divulged the dreadful truth of Goya’s painted visions, and more importantly, the truth of those stones whose own untold story might have spoken a truth that only Felipe would have comprehended, enwrapping him thus in many veils of a strange, naïve self-satisfied truth. A truth that went beyond human reasoning, struggling in a twilight zone of Felipe’s own story within the quagmire.
It stands to reason that Felipe Jimenez had experienced what some call the ‘sense of the past’. A troubling experience that may occur at any instant of time or by incessant galloping between the past and the present. Nevertheless, it must be recorded that Felipe never really believed that he would fully join or unite the stony vestiges of a lost kingdom to the ‘black paintings’ by Francisco de Goya. Perhaps this sentiment or fantasy can be compared to the horse-shoe arch whose two bottom abutting stones sought to conjoin in a circle … in vain …
Be that as it may, our heroic Felipe died without friends or family. Only three of his sketches have been preserved. Oddly enough, they were discovered on the inside cover of a 1780 Royal Spanish Academy edition of El Ingenioso Hidalgo Don Quijote de la Mancha written by Miguel de Cervantes[15], edited by Joaquin Ibarra. In this same edition were also found several scattered notes in the margins presumedly jotted down by Felipe.
Felipe Jimenez’s tomb has never been located. Does this obliterate his existence ? I for one believe he did exist. However, many historians contend that he never existed at all …
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[1] Francisco de Goya (1746 – 1828) born in Fuentedetodos, Spain died in Bordeaux, France.
[15]The Ingenous Gentleman, Don Quixote of La Mancha by Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra (1547-1616)
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Paul Mirabile is a retired professor of philology now living in France. He has published mostly academic works centred on philology, history, pedagogy and religion. He has also published stories of his travels throughout Asia, where he spent thirty years.
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