By Jun A. Alindogan
Grace refers to unmerited favour, a universal concept associated with both psychology and philosophy. It signifies the ability to function and thrive amid vulnerabilities and denotes unconditional love, serving as a guiding and healing influence that connects humanity, irrespective of merit or effort. Individuals and even places can act as conduits of grace. There is no such thing as a gracious coincidence; many individuals are often unaware of their own experiences of grace. Reflection is integral to developing this sensitivity.
I was barely out of my teens when my father lay comatose for more than a month in the hospital where I was born. He eventually passed away at 62, leaving my younger siblings and me as minors, and my mother widowed at a young age.
My father wanted my eldest brother to become a certified public accountant, as he was a bookkeeper himself. This dream was realised when my brother passed the exam on his first attempt. I vividly recall the celebration at a Chinese restaurant in the city, where my mother’s co-teachers and supervisors were also present. My father beamed with pride as he engaged in conversation with my mother’s colleagues about my brother’s success. The food was exceptionally delicious, and everyone enjoyed it. In time, my brother secured a position at an established accounting firm, which my father, unfortunately, did not live to see.
On the other hand, my mother lived a full life but passed away two months shy of her 80th birthday due to undocumented dementia. I am uncertain if this condition is genetic. Our family’s request focused on ensuring that my mother would not suffer significantly before her departure. She peacefully passed away almost two decades ago. It was also a most trying time for our family, as my youngest sibling underwent surgery for a benign brain tumour in North America around the time of our mother’s passing. Two months ago, this brother celebrated his 60th birthday.
During the onslaught of Typhoon Ondoy (Typhoon Ketsana), I was away from my coastal suburban home on a weekend while teaching my weekly Academic Writing class at a seminary. It was understandable that my cousin’s family, who were temporarily staying with me, chose to leave our residence as the water level rose to chest height. Regrettably, my clothes, desktop computer, photographs, and both personal and work documents were completely swept away by the flood, and nothing was salvaged in the aftermath.
Two seminary students supported me after this ordeal, without informing them of this tragic episode. One organised clothes from their family closet, providing me with quality clothing and some cash to help me. The other invited me for coffee and pastries at a mall shop, where she also gave me some good clothes and cash in an envelope. We exchanged stories about the ordeal, which made the loss somewhat more bearable.
Years prior to my seminary teaching, I was accepted into an advanced leadership training program at an international institute based in Singapore. However, I needed to raise US $300 as part of my counterpart fee for the month-long training. As a freelance teacher and writer, my funds were limited; however, after corresponding with an elderly lady whom I have never met in person, based in the U.S. and headed a mission-related NGO, kindly sent me a check to cover my training expenses. This experience was particularly memorable, as it marked my first overseas trip.
As part of my routine, I often schedule a massage with a blind masseur at a mall near my residence. After a recent seated massage, I fainted, likely due to the air conditioning’s inability to counteract the heat. The masseur and manager fanned me and provided water once I regained consciousness a few minutes later. These episodes are rare; however, as always, there is someone looking after me.
In terms of my freelance writing, every time I felt discouraged and considered giving it up entirely, opportunities for publication would appear. More importantly, feedback from readers indicates they were able to relate to my stories, as they resonated with their personal experiences. My experiences attest to the enduring quality of grace in various seasons of life, which I continually rediscover, relearn, and rewrite. While the operation of grace is always invisible, its manifestations become clear when an individual recognises that its timeline is not necessarily linear. Last year, an essay on diminishing memory was included in an anthology. While grace is difficult to define, one’s openness is key to understanding how it relates to our everyday encounters. Grace always matters as it continues to abound in all aspects of our lives.
Manuel A. Alindogan, Jr. or Jun A. Alindogan is the Academic Director of the Expanded Alternative Learning Program of Empowered East, a Rizal-province based NGO in the Philippines and is also the founder of Speechsmart Online that specializes in English test preparation courses. He is a freelance writer and a member of the Freelance Writers’ Guild of the Philippines (FWGP).
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