By Snigdha Agrawal
The sun often shone brightly in the small, quiet town of Uttarpara,[1] illuminating the newly laid asphalt-lined streets and vibrant gardens in front of most houses. But for Gowri, an elderly woman of seventy-eight, the light had dimmed to a dull flicker. Outside her window, life bustled, yet she felt it was happening on a different planet.
Once she had been the mover in her community—a fierce advocate for women’s empowerment, engaging them in revenue-earning activities, through pottery, painting, cooking, and weaving, supported by her husband Shekhar, a well-known and respected member of the society.
After her husband’s untimely death, the warmth in her home began to fade. She sought the warmth from her artist friends. This did not sit well with her children. They objected to her carrying on with the social activities she was involved with. Well-meaning yet misguided, they insisted it was for her safety. They believed that the world had grown too dangerous for someone of her age. So, they began the process of isolating her, one layer at a time.
At first, it was simple. “Mom, why don’t you let us help with the groceries? We’ll just do a quick online order,” they suggested. That meant not going out. Gowri, though reluctant, acquiesced. Next came the visits that grew fewer and further apart, their busy lives seeming to expand while her own contracted.
Then, her virtual connections crumbled. “We think it’s best if you take a break from social media, and all online activities” her daughter said, her voice filled with concern. “It’s so easy to get duped. There are scammers out to make a quick buck. We will handle all your banking activities, and promise to call more often.” Once the financial control was in their hands, the calls dwindled as the months rolled by, replaced by a suffocating silence.
Gowri found herself trapped in a house that felt like a cage. The once vibrant laughter of her friends at the local art complex, housed in a garage, was replaced by echoes of memories. The absence of touch—of a hand on her shoulder, the embrace of a friend—left her feeling ghostlike, a shadow of her former self. She missed visits to the Sunday haat [2] where her line of pottery drew large crowds, crafted from mud collected from the Hooghly River.
As weeks turned into months, the isolation seeped into her mind, entwining itself with her thoughts. She felt as if she were part of a macabre dance, orchestrated by her family’s misguided affection. Each step in this dance led her further from the world, pulling her deeper into a solitude that echoed with the whispers of the past.
One night, Gowri stood by the window, gazing at the moonlit street. She could see the neighbours laughing, children playing, and couples walking hand in hand…a replay of vignettes from her life when she was younger strolling with her husband behind their skipping kids. She felt punched in the belly wrapped in insufferable loneliness that old age had brought on.
She was unprepared for the awakening that followed. The local community centre hosted an art exhibition, and for the first time in months, Gowri felt a flicker of hope. She longed to see her friends, to share in their laughter and creativity. Summoning her courage, she decided to venture out, despite the concerns of her family. They would have no inkling of her movements being so far removed from her home in Uttarpara.
With a look of determination, she stepped outside, dressed in her favourite cream with red border jamdani [3] saree, which Shekhar had bought from Dhaka on one of his official visits.
When she entered, the warmth enveloped her like a long-lost embrace. Friends turned, eyes widening in shock and delight. “Gowri!” they exclaimed, rushing to her side, their voices filling the air with the vibrant hues of life. At that moment, the dance of death that had surrounded her began to unravel, replaced by a lively rhythm of connection and joy. The spark in her eyes returned as she mingled with them, admiring the work put up for the exhibition. Her last painting rested on the easel occupying centre stage. This gesture made her feel she was never truly alone. A feeling of empowerment suffused her being.
Gowri realised that old age should not be a reason for isolation. It should not mean living in a cocoon, separated from the vibrant life that pulsed just beyond her door.
As she lay in bed, a smile crept across her face. The initiation into the dance of death had not claimed her; instead, she had stepped back into the dance of life, refusing to let anyone dictate the music. In the embrace of her memories and her friends, Gowri found a spark of defiance, a whisper of hope that would guide her forward.
The dance of death was only one story; the dance of life was hers to write anew.
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[1] City in West Bengal
[2] farmer’s market
[3] saree woven in Dhaka (Bangladesh)
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Snigdha Agrawal (nee Banerjee) is a published author of four books and a regular contributor to anthologies published in India and overseas. A septuagenarian, she writes in all genres of poetry, prose, short stories and travelogues.
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