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SEARCH FOR CONSCIOUSNESS

the expanse of the splintering fire flames flash
across space time, pouring onto grey pupils.
I like how they appear once, and then in another form: another.

lanterns of tinted glass in power starved the rural households,
streaking through bland darkness.
arrival of the faintest rays from the shaded corner of the
mud brick encased kitchen,

lights the letters on the pages to life.
rice puffs and fluffs on the oven pit, letting out splinters,
across the skin of burnt deadwood, like sparks in the void
of silence.

the newborn within me giggles to the flickering flames.
carried by the wind across the face of decades of dead, burnt leaves,
I search for consciousness.

I SEARCH FOR A FRIEND

I left my home; not knowing where I'd go. I
search for my friend in

the narrow alleys led on by dim lit street bulbs. 
it is the aftermath of the Bengali New Year; 
feels like the last one to bless us.

my friend, he has a voice. he wants to sing.
I run off in my pajamas for a front row seat

to the courtyard converted into an
auditorium. I knock at his front door. 
years of knocking scatter to dilution.

the deserted terrace smiles at me. empty smile.
empty house. rust crawls to my palm

from the railings. darkness piles on
my sweaty shirt collar. 

hands grappling through piles of epitaphs among
cluttered newspaper columns. I search
for a corpse.