Photograph and Poetry by Rhys Hughes
Steve’s Scaffolding is firm
but fair
and more convenient
than using
the stairs to scale the façade
of a building.
Metal pipes, riveted tight
are a grid-like
sight for casual sightseers
and that is right
but allow me
to tell you what is wrong.
King Kong.
Yes, that great big ape.
See him loom?
He is the issue we ought
to discuss: he is
the elephant in the room.
But larger
than an elephant, of course,
able to exert greater
force than any other living
creature. That’s his
main feature.
He can climb
structures with such speed
and skill it gives
us all a thrill
to watch him do it.
He can succeed
in reaching the summit
without the need
for a steel lattice.
It takes a lot of practice
but it’s possible.
He won’t plummet,
his hairy grip is firm
on every ledge
and windowsill edge.
He won’t fall
and end up in hospital
with broken limbs.
And so I ask you:
What use is
Steve’s Scaffolding
to King Kong?
Who is Steve anyway?
Why should
any gorilla obey
the safety regulations?
Among the nations
of the world
there are none that
pay any heed
to what King Kong
doesn’t need.
Scaffolding is
one of those things.
But I am here to say
that if you have a building
extremely tall
that you want climbed
for any reason at all
give him a call.
He knows how to use
a telephone:
his receiver is shaped
like a banana.
He will react to your
wish without
any palaver, trust me.
No matter
the season he’ll oblige,
scaling towers
on the outside: he trusts
elevators not a jot.
And when
he gets to the top, if you
have a biplane
or two (biplanes usually
come in pairs)
to buzz the hairs on his
head, he’ll be delighted
to swipe them
like flies: his party trick.
He isn’t wise
but he’s quick to act,
which means he isn’t quite
as thick or daft
as people like to claim.
No need to harbour
a grudge because he beats
his chest too loud.
Nor should he
be blamed for shedding fur
everywhere,
near or far, here or there:
he’s a gorilla,
not Attila the Hun’s barber.
But Steve has other ideas
and now it
finally becomes clear that
Steve is a dinosaur,
a prehistoric monster, yes,
a tyrannosaur
who sings in chorus with
the tectonic
groans of geological time.
He has millions of years
of experience
to help him mangle apes.
The mystery
of his survival can wait
to be solved.
More important is what
he plans to do
next: will he try to chew
King Kong’s
limbs or head? I dread to
even speculate.
But the outcome is good,
my fears are
groundless, the joy seems
boundless as
giant ape and tyrannosaur
shake hands
unexpectedly, like friends
from long ago.
Steve’s scaffolding business
is expanding,
the work is too demanding
for one dinosaur.
He needs a partner to share
the load, his
former colleague was a toad
and not skilled at paperwork.
King Kong has come along
at the right moment.
Steve asks him bluntly: do
you want the job?
The huge ape nods his head,
keen to partake of the
entrepreneurial dream.
They will be a monster team.
Steve and Kong’s Scaffolding
is firm but fair
and more convenient
than using the stairs
to reach the softest of lights,
the inflamed moon,
or ascend the giddy heights of
fame and fortune
Rhys Hughes has lived in many countries. He graduated as an engineer but currently works as a tutor of mathematics. Since his first book was published in 1995 he has had fifty other books published and his work has been translated into ten languages.
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